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4 Moms Q&A: Life with littles, dating, happy helpers

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

4 Moms, 35 Kids

It’s the 4th Thursday of the month, and that’s the one where we 4 Moms bare our souls and our linen closets as we answer your questions about what really goes on in our heads, our hearts, and our homes.  Because I can’t seem to keep track of questions from month to month or even week to week, I’ve been asking what you want to know on Facebook the day before our Q&A posts.  Here are the questions I received.

Brianah Dodson asks, “What did your day look like when you had all littles? I have a one year old & two year old and I can’t seem to get much done during the day.”

Brianah, they were definitely busy times.  I have a dim recollection of the days blending together into one endless laundry/cooking/diaper-changing session.  My children remember far more about that time period than I do, probably because I lived in a constant state of sleep deprivation.  But they remember fun times, good times, loving family times and crazy sister times, and I’m glad to rely on their memories to replace what I have forgotten!

I wrote a little about what our days looked like back then in For Tired Young Mothers of Many.  Life With Littles was written to help and encourage those who are still in the trenches.  Maybe you’ll find some encouragement in them during this busy season of your life!

Savannah Perkins-Berniquez wonders,  ”in what ways do your husbands help with homeschooling?”

Over the years, the way that Perry is involved in homeschooling has changed many times.  Sometimes he actually sat at the table and taught a subject.  Other times, he provided accountability outside of me by inquiring directly with the children or asking to see their work – “Did you do your math today?  Let’s see your writing.”  His love of history and grasp of the big picture has played a heavy part in developing theirs.  He often assigns books on various topics for the older girls to read, usually requiring a written report with each one.

I think the point isn’t really the specifics of what he does, but the fact that he is an interested, involved party in the process.  He realizes that he has a stake in what happens and is ultimately responsible for the education of the children even if the greatest portion of the daily job is delegated to me – or directly to the children as they get older.

More important than which subject(s) he teaches is the fact that he keeps our collective eye on the goal: he helps us remember the ultimate goal of Christian education so we all know what direction we’re heading.

Lori Dunn Browning says, “I have one that has come up recently at our house: what do you do [if] the bigs are burnt out on being happy helpers? I can see how this situation gets easier the more bigs you have, but right now I only have 2, & I feel like I ask a lot of them. They are always helpful but I also want them to have time to just be kids.”

Lori, I think this is a tricky question with two very important parts.

First, I think we moms need to let go of the guilt.  We all agree that it’s wonderful to play together as a family, but we feel guilty about requiring our children to work.  Society tells us that we are robbing our little ones of their childhood if we don’t let them spend their days in play, but what is society producing?  30 year old children who live in their parents’ basement, filling their days with video games.  There’s something horribly wrong with this picture.  That doesn’t mean our children’s lives should be full of never-ending chores with no time to play, but we are supposed to be training our children for adulthood, and it’s a big job.  They don’t need to practice at childishness; that part comes naturally.  We need to help them grow up and out of that childishness.  Work is an indispensable tool in that process.

Second, I think it’s important to use that tool properly.  Just making children work more will not create a good attitude or work ethic in them.  We want to teach our children that work is a good thing, not a drudgery.  We may not always enjoy it, but the Bible teaches us that in all labor there is profit.  Our children are more likely to be happy helpers if we are working along with them rather than watching from the sidelines (guilty!).  They also need to see us working joyfully.  In short, we need to set the sort of example we want them to follow: diligent work with a good attitude.  And a little reward for a job well done isn’t a bad idea…

Maryjo Jones Miller wants to know, “now that you have older girls how do you and your husband handle them dating?”

Maryjo, Perry and I only recently started dating.  ;)

Seriously, we don’t plan for our children to participate in “normal” dating because God holds us responsible for our daughter’s purity.  But don’t jump to the conclusion that our children are doomed to a lonely and celibate existence.  Our children – including our teen daughters – have healthy friendships with people of all ages, including more than a few members of the opposite sex.  They interact frequently in various group settings, never far from adults who know them.

When it comes to one-on-one dating, we think this should be reserved for engaged couples, and even then it’s hardly “normal”: they will do 99% of their interacting in a church or family setting, i.e. in and among people who know them.  On the rare occasion when they go somewhere else, they will take a chaperon with them.

I love Voddie Baucham’s thoughts on dating.

Elizabeth took a chance and emailed her question: I was wondering what you are planning on doing as far as a high school diploma?  Our state allows Home Schoolers to make out their own diploma and we seem to have had no trouble with that being accepted.  Is that what you plan on doing as well?

Elizabeth, we’ll make our own.  There are plenty of ways to print out a diploma, and as a homeschool graduate I have *never* been asked to present my diploma anyway, nor have any of our friends run into problems – even when enrolling their children in various colleges and universities.  The more widespread homeschooling becomes, the less these questions matter as others become accustomed to working with homeschoolers.

The other moms are trying to satisfy your curiosity too:


Upcoming topics for 4 Moms:

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Zoo photos

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

Last week while Perry was at a hunting ranch with 6 of the children, I took the other 4 to the San Antonio Zoo.  It was a warm, breezy day and we had a wonderful time as the 5 of us ambled slowly around, taking in the sights and sounds.  The kids found the smells less than delightful, but I reminded them that it was a package deal – much like small children.

They were delighted at the prairie dogs, who were likewise delighted with us.  We found one little guy right at the glass, wagging his tail and watching passers-by.

We watched as 3 porcupines had a pushing match over lunch.  They were understandably courteous, but even so one wound up with a quill protruding from his cheek.  On our last visit, these guys were standing up against the fence letting us pet their soft noses.

Observe the fearsome jungle fowl, safely behind bars.  Judging from his secure enclosure, he must be more dangerous than the tomistoma, who was just inches out of reach with nothing but a waist-high fence between us.

The massive 12-foot tomistoma, a freshwater crocodile.  I would love to say I touched him, but his tail was just 3 inches out of reach.  Instead, I just lingered at the enclosure, amazed and horrified at his size and proximity.

This Nile Crocodile was nearly as close, but there was thick glass between us.  I don’t know why; he seemed friendly enough.  See how he smiled at us?

I went around to get a better picture from another angle, while Becca and Parker stayed behind.

It took me a minute to figure out what we’re looking at here.  Can you see it?

I was so tickled to see the proper end of the hippos this time!  I love hippos, but I love them best when we’re not watching their bottoms do what hippo bottoms do best.

I don’t know if every zoo is like this, but the San Antonio Zoo is full of metal sculptures of the animals.  We love to take pics of the kids on every one that we come across.

Becca doing what big sisters do best.  I’m so glad she decided to stay home with me and the little ones.

Have you ever held a bald eagle?  Have you ever seen one small enough to sit in the palm of your hand?

Ride ‘em, cowboy!

Bethany: “Mom, can we take a picture in the fake broken-head turtle?”

On the baby elephant, just outside the elephant enclosure.  We stopped here for lunch and watched the elephants eat, too.

Becca insisted on taking my picture on the baby elephant.  ”Was I making a weird face in that one?”

“Well,” she replied.  ”I did say I wanted to take another one…”

On the komodo dragon.  I don’t know why, but I find them fascinating.  The real ones here are every bit as big as the sculpture, and almost exactly the same color.

Two children, two sloths.

And our traditional zoo day finish: everyone on the lions at the entrance/exit.  Bye, zoo animals!  See you soon!

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Twilight vs. Tangled

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

I shared this on facebook and it was so wildly popular I didn’t want my non-facebook readers to miss it.  The image below is not mine, but I think it’s a brilliant summary of what is wrong with the Twilight obsession that continues to consume our society.  Girls, this is an intelligence test.

For a more in-depth analysis of the book that begat the movie, check out Doug Wilson’s multi-part book report beginning here, or his 8 minute video on the subject below:

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My failed attempt at blogging today

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

I’ve missed blogging lately, so today I set aside an hour of time to write a post. Since it’s hard for me to focus while life roars around me, I decided to hide away in my clean, quiet bedroom for that precious hour. I wanted to be able to think, to ponder, to formulate what’s on my mind and in my heart, so I could preserve my deepest thoughts and feelings here in my online journal. I wanted to create something deep and meaningful that my descendants could treasure in years to come, a way for them to know and understand me even after I’m gone.
Instead, I spent the first 35 minutes of my hour waiting for my netbook to boot, crash and reboot. Now I’m searching for instructions on how to restore it to factory settings. I also learned that it’s possible to attach a full size keyboard to my phone. This would enable me to smash my netbook into smithereens and repurpose it as potting soil, which sounds far more useful than its current state.
Maybe that’s too destructive. I could just pop all the keys off and use them to play scrabble, or use the hinge to replace the one on the kitchen cabinet that the squirrel broke last month. Maybe I could open it and set it on end as a bed riser?
If you have other ideas for my netbook, I’d love to hear them. How would you use it?

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4 Moms on buying and storing ALL THAT CLOTHING {linky}

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

4 Moms, 35 Kids

This week’s topic is frighteningly broad, and leaves me with 2 options: I can pick one aspect and beat it to death or I can skim over everything, trying to cover too much at once and leaving you feeling entirely unsatisfied.

Maybe there’s a third choice: try to make my post so entertaining that you won’t notice you didn’t really learn anything useful.  Oh, I like that.  Let’s do that.  Wait, does it work if I tell you the plan?

I’m kidding – or stalling, if you prefer to call it that.  Actually, I have LOTS of experience with mass quantities of clothing for mass quantities of people.  The question is whether you should follow my example or learn from my mistakes.  There’s a fine line, and believe me: when it comes to clothing for 12 you don’t want to find yourself on the wrong side.  You could spark a revolt, or a mass outbreak of nudity.

The trick is maintaining the general sanity and the clothing at the same time.  Not every day can be Nude Fasting TV Day.

Buying All Those Clothes

Buying is the easy part.  We love thrift shopping for everything but underclothes.  Shopping for secondhand clothes requires a bit more of a time investment, and nicer shops may have prices that rival those of some new clothes, but you’ll usually find much better quality, more variety, and it’s a good way to avoid pieces that are too trendy.  By the time it’s on the thrift store rack, you’ll know if the newest style is going to last more than 10 minutes.  We have a new way of handling clothing purchases and other personal expenses for the older girls, and I can’t wait to tell you about it in an upcoming post.

Did you know that Goodwill offers gift cards and accepts returns?  It’s just like shopping at any other store now, and in this new thrifty era even the social stigma is gone – not that some of us ever cared about that.

Buying becomes even easier when friends make it entirely unnecessary.  I do my best to let others know that we are never, under any circumstances, insulted by offers of hand-me-downs.  We love it when our friends cull their closets and give us that skirt we’ve been eyeing since the first time they wore it.  One time the Long ladies sent us some hand-me-downs, samples, proto-types, etc, and Oh My Word We Had Fun Were Blessed.  Can you imagine the riches that come forth when they make room in their closets for new creations?  We can now.

Storing All Those Clothes

Storing clothing for a big family is a much bigger challenge, especially when your home is smaller than the standard-issue McMansion.  In our home, the children usually store their clothes on the floor or under the bed.

Yours too, huh?

Well, that’s not the officially sanctioned plan.  The clothes are supposed to be stored in fabric bins on cubby shelves or hung in the closets, and we really do love our current setup.  The bins won’t hold up forever, especially when kids overstuff them with wadded up jeans, but they are cheaper and easier to replace than a busted drawer.  They also make for a cute, flexible system that can be expanded, rearranged and redecorated as desired.

Actually, that photo is from months ago when we first set up the system.  That’s when I loved it.  Now you don’t want to see it, though even at its worst it still looks far better than dressers ever did in our house.  Let’s just say my kids have the pack rat gene.  I don’t know where they got it.  Why yes, I do have 3 broken sewing machines and a serger which I have never learned to use.  Why do you ask?
Link up and tell how you manage clothing for your family!

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We capture our invader [part 3 of the indoor squirrel adventure]

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

 

Part 1: In which we have unwelcome visitors

Part 2: Our unwelcome invader is revealed

It was a beautiful plan that couldn’t fail.  The squirrel would dive through its customary escape hatch and instead of freedom, the other end of the dryer duct would drop her right into a rabbit cage with me poised to snap the door shut.

Kaitlyn and Deanna were in the laundry room, waiting for my signal.  I was below, ready and waiting.  Unbeknownst to the rest of us, Becca had crept into the laundry room to watch, leaving the door open behind her.

You see it coming, don’t you?

When we were all ready, they prodded the hiding squirrel.  She shot out from beneath the laundry and instead of heading for the dryer vent she began skittering back and forth in a panic behind the dryer, around and between my squealing daughters.

“Where is it going?!  What should we do???”

“Grab it!  Get it!”

“There it goes!”

“AAAHHHH!”

While I listened below in horror, I tried to piece together what was happening.  The squirrel had dashed around a bit, ran up the length of Deanna’s body and launched itself across the laundry room.  Then it had skidded past Becca and into the kitchen, where it hid behind the fridge.

They pulled out the fridge and scared it out with a broomstick, then I heard a thundering, laughing, yelling stampede cross the length of the house.  ”Noooo!  Get the dogs!  Lock them up!”

The dogs barked helplessly from a bedroom as little paws skittered across the tile and children thundered back toward the laundry room.  I prepared myself.  Surely now the squirrel would escape and fall into my trap.

They yelled and headed to the other end again.  ”It just flew off the top of the door frame!  It’s like a flying squirrel!!!”

“It’s behind the couch!”  I heard furniture sliding.  The stampede headed my way again.  I got ready to snap the cage shut, but with no expectation of actually being called to duty.  The noise moved again to the far end of the house.

“It’s in the Christmas tree!!!  Is it in the tree?  Where is it?”

I dutifully stayed at my post, amused but annoyed that I was missing all the fun.

Finally, I heard them moving one last time toward my end of the house.  Everyone was quieter this time.  The squirrel was exhausted, terrified, and losing hope.  It finally hid in the laundry room behind a small stack of vinyl tile.  As the girls moved the boxes away one by one, the squirrel’s body slowly emerged.  When the last box was moved, it stayed right where it was, hiding its face behind its paws.  They set a bucket over it and slid a vinyl tile beneath, and the chase was over.

I carried the empty cage up to the house where we carefully transferred our captive, and we all sat down to swap accounts of exactly what had happened.

note:  The video freezes after about 1.5 minutes. I tried to trim it but youtube was having problems so I’ll have to try again later. In the meantime, you’ll know when to stop because it gets really, really boring.

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If you give a mom a minute…

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

She’s going to need 30.

Remember the book, If You Give a Mouse a Cookie?  One thing logically leads to another.  That books is a perfect description of what I did just a few hours ago, only I’m not suffering from ADHD like the mouse in the story.  My whole train of thought always makes perfect sense.  I’m sure you understand.

My sister-in-law was watching 3 of my younger children, and I called to tell her I was 15 minutes away, and I was bringing a bottle of wine so we could visit over a glass.

My house is less than a 1/4 mile from her house, so I just needed to stop in and grab a bottle before I headed over the hill.

When I pulled into my driveway, I noticed the door to the chicken coop was open.  For the safety of the chickens, I needed to close it before I left.

When I went to close the door, I noticed the feeder was empty.  I had a bag of feed in the trunk of the car, so I hauled it into the coop and filled the feeder.

While I was filling the feeder, I spotted a collection of eggs in the nesting boxes.  ”Oh, Lydia is gone this weekend.  I need to gather the eggs for her.”

I carried the 14 eggs carefully in my shirt, and on my way across the yard I stopped to let the Aussie off her leash.  She gets tied up sometimes during the day, but always spends her nights in the house with us.  She promptly took off.

After a brief but fruitless period of yelling her name into the darkness, I continued up the drive to the house.  In the house, I found an egg carton and put away the eggs.  As I put them away, my alarm went off.  It was my reminder to give the Golden Retriever her medication.

I tried to feed the tiny pill to her disguised in a piece of baked potato, but she was unimpressed.  ”Don’t you have any meat or cheese?” her eyes inquired.  The pill fell on the floor as she mouthed the baked potato and my eyes said to her, “EAT IT.  NOW.”  She decided to comply.

When I was done with the Golden Retriever, I remembered that the Aussie was still gone.  I went outside and called her.  And called her.  And called her.  Finally, she popped up at the bottom of the driveway looking far too happy.  If any of the neighbors is missing a goat or a chicken or a shoe, I think I know who did it.  I coaxed her into the house telling her what a good girl she was[n't].

After my battle of wills with the dogs, I remembered that the alarm on my phone a few minutes served a dual purpose: I am supposed to take my vitamins when I give the dog her medication.  I opened 4 bottles in succession and washed the pills down with a glass of water.

The glass of water reminded me that I needed to go to the bathroom.  Really bad.  I did the potty walk to the bathroom.

On my way out of the bathroom, I passed a bottle of wine sitting on the counter and remembered why I was in the house.

And finally I was back in the car with a bottle of wine, heading over the hill to retrieve my little ones and visit my sister-in-law.

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Make money online

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

While I stall and try to find time and brain cells for a real post, I just thought I’d toss this out for anyone who might find it useful.  It’s a list of companies that pay you to fill out surveys.  Some pay cash, others let you accumulate points toward free merchandise and gift cards, which can be very nearly as good as cash if they are for stores or items you really want.

All are affiliate links, so if you join one I expect a modest kickback.  If you already do any of these, what do you think?  I’m assuming that they do not provide a very good return on your time, but some are fun and they pay a lot more than nothing, which is what you usually get for killing time on the web.

  • Inbox Dollars – Very popular, I think because this company goes far beyond surveys and provides plenty of opportunities.  In this case, I think you can actually hope for a reasonable return on your time if you choose your offers carefully.
  • Memo Link – earn cash & gift cards
  • My Survey - earn cash & gift cards
  • MyView – earn gift cards
  • Nielson – This one sounds fun – you get a free handheld scanner scan the products in your home!  Give it to the kids and let ‘em rip, and you get paid for their “work”.
  • Surveys.com – earn points & rewards
  • Under One Roof – earn points
  • Vindale Research‘ - says you get rewarded.  I *think* they pay cash.

Now, what should I *really* blog about?  I have to confess I’m a little obsessed with guns right now since Perry let me choose a new one for my birthday/Christmas gift, and the choice required a lot of research.  I haven’t blogged about it because I suspect many of you are either indifferent or uncomfortable with the subject.  Am I wrong?

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4 Moms: snacks and appetizers for a crowd {linky}

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

4 Moms, 35 Kids

Snacks are a Sunday evening tradition for us.  After a big weekly fellowship meal at church, we just aren’t in the mood for a formal dinner.  We would rather share snacks and appetizers, and if we do it right we find that we have a party even when it’s just the 12 of us!

A big part of what makes it a party rather than an evening snack is variety.  Instead of making enough of one dish to fill up 12 bellies, we like to create a variety of appetizers.  This may be a little more work, but work can be fun and the results are more appealing.  It also makes it easier to feed a crowd when you don’t feel the need to have/find enough ____ to feed everyone.

Just picture it: one bowl of popcorn and a movie = family night.  Sausage balls, bacon wrapped jalapenos, apples with dip, cheese & cracker platter, veggie tray = Party!

We love to work together in the kitchen as a family, with knives flashing, food flying, and music playing.  If we make a mess, we have enough hands to clean it up.

I already shared our recipe for sausage balls.  Here are some of our other favorites:

Bacon Wrapped Jalapenos

Relax, and don’t let the jalapenos scare you.  With seeds removed, they’re just not that hot.

  • 12 small or medium sized jalapenos
  • 6 slices bacon
  • 6 oz. cream cheese

Carefully slice jalapenos in half lengthwise.  Cut out center with seeds and webbing.  Wear gloves if you have very sensitive skin.  Use a gentle touch if you don’t like too much heat – it’s on and around the seeds, so the more they touch the walls of the jalapeno the hotter your end product will be.  If you like a little heat, let the 5yo do this job, but warn him not to pick his nose, rub his eyes,  or put his fingers in his mouth afterward.  Do you think it sounds mean to even let a 5yo touch a jalapeno?  Relax.  I’m probably just kidding.

Now that your jalapenos are prepared, use a teaspoon to load them with cream cheese.

Here’s the good part.  Wrap each jalapeno with half a slice of bacon and secure with a toothpick.  Bacon makes everything better, right?  Even chocolate, but especially jalapenos.

Place on a cookie sheet with sides or a baking pan.  Don’t use a pizza pan or cookie sheet without sides, because the bacon grease will drip, filling your house with smoke and setting off your fire alarm.  Then you’ll have to open the doors and windows even though it smells really good inside and it’s 38 degrees outside, and your smoke alarm will keep going off anyway while your family alternately laughs at you and complains about their burning eyes.

So…bake on something with sides for 30-40 minute at 400.  When the bacon is done to your liking, they’re ready.  Enjoy, and try to share.

Cream Cheese Fruit Dip

Perfect with apples, or eat with a spoon when nobody is looking.  If they catch you, hand them a spoon and swear them to secrecy.

  • 8 oz. cream cheese, softened
  • 1/4 to 1/2 cup brown sugar
  • 1/2 tsp. vanilla

Stir and enjoy.  You won’t believe 3 simple ingredients can taste this good.

What is your favorite snack or appetizer recipe?  How do you like to feed a crowd – one mega recipe or several smaller ones?
Link up with your own post!

  1. You must link to a specific relevant post on your blog.
  2. Your post must include a link to at least one of the 4 Moms blogs.
  3. The post you link to must be completely family friendly.

If your link is deleted, you probably didn’t follow one of the rules above. Please feel free to add your link again once you have fixed the problem. If you don’t know why your link was deleted, please ask.

 

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Upcoming topics for 4 Moms:

  • January 19 - How to organize, shop for and maintain ALL THAT CLOTHING {linky}
  • January 26 - Q&A
  • February 2 - Scriptures and/or stories we rely on for comfort/encouragement as a homeschooling family

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Our unwelcome invader is revealed

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

A few days ago, I told you about our unwelcome invader.

Based on the droppings and the fact that it was hanging out on the kitchen counters, we assumed it was a rat – or worse yet, a colony of rats.  We were in a tizzy, buying and setting traps everywhere we could.  We even bought some sonic repellents, plugging them into 4 outlets in and around the kitchen.  Yes, we were that desperate.

But when Deanna finally caught a glimpse of the culprit scurrying up the drying rack and diving behind the dryer, she laughed out loud.

“Mom!  I saw it!  It’s a squirrel!”

I think I can speak for the whole family when I tell you we breathed a collective sigh of relief.  Yes, they may be known as tree rats, but who would you rather have in your kitchen?

ugh! it's a disgusting ugly rat! somebody kill it!

can we keep him, mom?!

Not that we actually wanted to have a squirrel in our kitchen, either.  We still wanted it out, but not with the same passion and horror.  We just wanted it to stop breaking stuff and pooping, and we didn’t think it would agree to visit us on those terms.

We spent the next hour taking turns peeking through the crack at the top of the laundry room door, oohing and aahing at the adorableness of little squirrel hands and feet and fluffy tails.  We took videos and tried to get some photos.

Then we started thinking up a plan.  The plan seemed pretty simple.  We decided the squirrel was coming in through the dryer vent, so we would block the vent under the house and catch the squirrel while it was trapped in the laundry room.

Most of us kept watching through the crack while Becca and Kaitlyn went below to secure the exit.  At their signal, I opened the door and the squirrel dove behind the dryer.  I heard a scuffle and some excited exclamations: “I felt it!  Did you feel it?!  It went back up!”  They pushed the entire dryer duct up through the hole in the floor, then blocked the hole with a rock.

Step 1 had succeeded.  The squirrel was now trapped somewhere in the laundry room.  We were reasonably sure it was hiding in the inner workings of the dryer.

Umm…Now what?

We obviously didn’t think this through very well.

After a little consideration, we pulled the vent off the back of the dryer and peered inside.  Nothing.

I turned the dryer on for just a second then off again quickly, trying to flush the critter.  Still nothing.

We put a laundry basket over the opening and found a board big enough to cover the top of the basket.  We slid the board between the back of the dryer and the basket, stopping just above the vent opening, and Kaitlyn volunteered to stake out the trap.  When the squirrel ventured out of the dryer, she would drop the board between the vent opening and the basket, trapping the squirrel in the basket.  The rest of us left while Kaitlyn stayed behind, still and quiet.  We wanted the squirrel to think we were gone.

After a few minutes, Kaitlyn called me in.  She had seen movement under a skirt lost behind the washer.  A closer look revealed a furry tail tip.  We had been tricked! Now what?

We could have just put on a pair of gloves and grabbed the skirt with the poor animal wrapped up inside.  That’s exactly what some of the girls wanted to do, but I knew that a cornered animal would readily bite, and I didn’t know how strong a squirrel might be when it was fighting for its life.  I had no confidence that we could hold it like that.

I had a better plan.  A complete plan.  A plan that was beautiful in its simplicity.  I knew how we could catch this squirrel without having to chase it or risk being bitten by a terrified animal.

While the squirrel waited for the right moment to make her break for freedom, we put the duct back in the hole.  I went below the house and positioned the end of the duct inside a rabbit cage.  I even draped the opening of the cage with a pillow case so the squirrel couldn’t escape in the time it took me to yank out the duct and snap the door shut.

Perfect, right?  How could it fail?

to be cont’d

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4 Moms: Teaching grammar

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

4 Moms, 35 Kids

Welcome back to the 4 Moms weekly posts.  You can welcome me back, too, because I’ve been gone for a few weeks.  I had a lovely break from blogging over the holidays, but sadly I won’t remember a bit of it since I DIDN’T BLOG ANY OF IT.  Ironic, no?

At least I’m blogging about our recent rodential invader, so we’ll remember that story in years to come, but that’s not why you’re here today.  You’re here to learn how I teach my children grammar.  Because I am a homeschooler, and obviously I teach my children grammar, right?

Wrong.  Maybe you already picked up on that when I began a sentence with a conjunction.  I don’t teach grammar.

We are relaxed homeschoolers, so I love it when real life results in lessons learned relatively painlessly.  Texts may be better at covering all the bases in an orderly fashion, but is that approach really intrinsically superior?  Will my children be stunted in “the real world” if they don’t learn all their Important Facts & Concepts at the institutionally determined appropriate age and time?  Will they miss out on job opportunities because I forgot to teach them to diagram sentences?  Will they be less able to glorify God and enjoy Him forever?

Psst…those were rhetorical questions. The answers are “no,” “no,” and “no.”

If I’ve done my job properly, they will have the ability to crack a book (or open up google) and learn to diagram sentences should the need arise.  The same goes for conjugating German verbs, identifying the bones of the human hand, and memorizing the names of the early Chinese emperors.  While they are learning, I also want to teach them to learn. I don’t want to simply pour facts into open minds.  I want active minds that are constantly learning, growing, inquiring, and thinking critically.

I’m not saying these things are unimportant, or that none of my children have or will learn them, but they are incidental to the ultimate goal of Christian education.

I’m also not saying that there is anything wrong with a more structured approach.  We have used Saxon math for many years.  Kaitlyn and Lydia are currently enrolled in an online interactive essay class to help develop and polish their writing skills.  We have used other textbooks and formal courses on occasion, but they are not the backbone of our curriculum.

So…how do my children learn grammar if they’re not filling in the blanks of a grammar workbook 3 days/week for 12 years?

They read, and they write.  I read what they wrote, and we talk about what they read and write.  I correct their spoken and written grammar as the opportunity arises, talking about the parts of speech and explaining the difference between objective and subjective pronouns, etc.  OK, so maybe I do teach them grammar, but I don’t know why they call me the Gramminator.

Learning happens other ways, too.  We play Mad Libs.  I have a book called Eats Shoots and Leaves that I want my older children to read.

They learn in the course of real life, the way so much other learning takes place.

The other moms are teaching grammar too.  See what they have to say:


Upcoming topics for 4 Moms:

  • January 12 - Snacks and appetizers for a crowd
  • January 19 - How to organize, shop for and maintain ALL THAT CLOTHING {linky}
  • January 26 - Q&A
  • February 2 - Scriptures and/or stories we rely on for comfort/encouragement as a homeschooling family

Recent topics:

About 4 Moms, including a complete list of all past topics

 

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In which we have unwelcome visitors

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

Although we have lived in the country for the past 8 years, we have been very blessed.  We have never seen a rodent inside the house.  Well, except for the ones in cages, like all the gerbils we bred as snake and tarantula food.  And also the rabbits the kids brought into the house, but they were cute and domesticated, and are they technically even rodents, or just closely related?

Anyway, I felt very fortunate that we had never had to deal with an invasion of rats or mice.  We’ve had other invasions – armies of daddy longlegs come to mind – but never rats and mice.

But a few weeks ago, we came home to a kitchen that almost looked like it had been ransacked.  An entire row of jars holding dry goods had been knocked out of one window sill, and another row of pint jars holding water in rainbow colors had been knocked out of the window over the sink.  One cabinet door had been torn loose and was dangling from a single hinge.

 

We were shocked and puzzled.  We cleaned up and pondered what to do.  It was a very busy week, and somehow I managed to “forget” about the problem.  This wasn’t quite as hard as you might imagine, since there were no further signs of occupation.  No poop, no chewed packages in the pantry, nothing.  It never happened, I told myself.  The jars must have fallen, somehow.  Maybe the cat was taking liberties on the kitchen counter, and the dogs had challenged his right to be up there.

A week or two passed with no further signs of unwelcome visitors.  We had family from out of town staying with us, and all of us left in 3 vehicles to brave the crowds and do a little last-minute gift shopping.  I returned home late in the afternoon with a few of the children, and we found that there had been a poop party in the kitchen.  The entire counter was littered with rodent dropping, and things were moved about.  I was horrified, and we bleached every surface in sight, throwing away any food that might have been accessible.

Now it was obvious that we had been invaded.  I became obsessive about hiding every scrap of food before we went to bed at night.  I was concerned that hiding the easy food sources might encourage the critters to invade the pantry, but it never happened.   I checked the pantry constantly for signs of rodents, but found nothing.  I bought and set some old-fashioned mousetraps in the kitchen, placing them along the window sill, against the wall, and anywhere I had noticed a heavier share of droppings.

The next morning all the traps had been sprung but we hadn’t caught a single varmint.

Aha, we thought.  RATS.  We needed the big snap-traps.  We bought the big’uns and set them all over the counter.   Instead of relying on the prebaited traps, we smeared peanut butter on them.  Just for good measure, we also bought some rat-sized glue boards. We wanted to be sure this time was successful, because I was afraid our invaders would get smart and avoid the traps altogether if we didn’t catch them soon.

We had a few peaceful days with no signs of visitors at all.  Then we left again for a daytime outing.  When we came home, all the rat traps had been sprung and the bait was untouched.  The glue boards were empty – except for a few footprints!  They looked like this:

And they were surprisingly big.  We briefly wondered if we were dealing with a very young raccoon, but thought it would have been far more destructive.  It was a big rat, we decided.  And since the droppings varied in size, maybe it was a mother accompanied by her half-grown offspring.  I felt a rising sense of panic.  Did you know rats can have up to 20 young in one litter?

We gave up on the snap traps, but left the glue boards out just in case.  We caught 6 flies, 2 geckos, and our 12yo cat, Tim.  He was not happy about this.

Our invaders grew bolder.  We began to hear noises during the day.  We heard them behind the refrigerator.  We heard a big scuffle when we opened the laundry room door.

We considered our next move.  Should we get a younger cat, maybe a female with some hunting experience?  I wasn’t entirely ready for the longterm commitment of a new pet, but was ready to consider the possibility.

Perry came home with a battery powered trap shaped like a small mailbox that would electrocute rats.  We were seeing a lot of droppings on the dryer, so set it up there and baited it with cat food.  It was much too small for the cat to fit inside, so it seemed fairly safe.

Finally, it happened.  Deanna was the first to actually lay eyes on our visitor.  She was carrying a basket to the laundry room and as she swung the door open, she caught her breath.

“Mom!  I just saw it!  It’s not a rat.  Do you know what it is?  Do you know it is???”

read part 2

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Merry Christmas, world!

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

Just popping in for a moment to let you know that the silence on my blog is good, not bad.  We’re busy preparing to celebrate the birth of our Savior, and hope you are too!

Blogging might not resume until sometime after the new year…then again maybe it will.  If you’ve been here long, you know how well I do at sticking to schedules.  If you haven’t been here long, you could spend the time you would have been reading new posts and review some old ones instead.  Or you could step away from the screen and make cookies.  Or clear a path through the stuff-bomb on the floor.  Whatever works best for you and yours.  I’m not judging, because I love all 3 ideas.

 

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Christmas articles for the struggling attitude

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

Remember my Bah, Humbug post, in which I confessed that I don’t like the holiday season?

Since then I have come across a couple of articles that have helped with my attitude.  In some cases, authors formulated what I had been thinking and trying to say far more clearly than I did.  In others, I was simply forced to rethink things in a different light.  Either way, I was ministered to, and I hope you will be.

 

G.K. Chesterton:

“Christmas is built upon a beautiful and intentional paradox; that the birth of the homeless should be celebrated in every home.”

 

By Rachel Jankovic, author of Loving the Little Years (which I am currently reading and loving!)

…Christmas is the ultimate celebration of the material. Because Christmas is the time when God became man. Word to Flesh. Unfettered spirit to the hazards and joys and stresses of physical life. Think about it. Some people want to filter the material out of Christmas and morph it into some pure ethereal spirit religious day. And some people want to filter all the spiritual out of it and make it simply a holiday celebrating the purchasing power of plastic. But the power of Christmas is when spiritual and material meet. And it always has been. That is the joy of the season, that is the good news, that is the laughter and the paradox and the earth-shaking magic of Christmas. The infinite Word became a physical baby.

It wasn’t like that first Christmas was a time of quiet reflection. Mary and Joseph were on a huge last-minute trip. And she’s big pregnant on a donkey? Think of it. It sounds like the worst travel experience of all time. No room. No bed. No privacy. Baby coming. Not just any baby either — one Mary knew was the Messiah. Angels? Shepherds dropping in? You think she felt dressed for that? I doubt Mary had time to throw together a cheese platter. She was in a barn, forced to place the King of kings — her Lord — in a trough. And I doubt her livestock roommates were quite as cute as they look in the storybooks.

The truth is, that’s what it’s like when the Spiritual becomes Material. When God became Man. It’s not easy, because it turns the world upside down, a true cataclysm of joy…read the rest

 

From C.S. Lewis’s God in the Dock:

Three things go by the name of Christmas. One is a religious festival. This is important and obligatory for Christians; but as it can be of no interest to anyone else, I shall naturally say no more about it here. The second (it has complex historical connections with the first, but we needn’t go into them) is a popular holiday, an occasion for merry-making and hospitality. If it were my business to have a ‘view’ on this, I should say that I much approve of merry-making. But what I approve of much more is everybody minding his own business. I see no reason why I should volunteer views as to how other people should spend their own money in their own leisure among their own friends. It is
highly probable that they want my advice on such matters as little as I want theirs. But the third thing called Christmas is unfortunately everyone’s business.
I mean of course the commercial racket. The interchange of presents was a very small ingredient in the older English festivity. Mr. Pickwick took a cod with him to Dingley Dell; the reformed Scrooge ordered a turkey for his clerk; lovers sent love gifts; toys and fruit were given to children. But the idea that not only all friends but even all acquaintances should give one another presents, or at least send one another cards, is quite modern and has been forced upon us by the shopkeepers. Neither of these circumstances is in itself a reason for condemning it. I condemn it on the following grounds…read the rest

 

And a quote from my wise and understanding husband:

I think too many Christians stress about the (false) dichotomy between the spiritual and material aspects of Christmas. It’s a FEASTing season where we give good things to our families.
Relax, it’s OK for the kids to be excited about the food and the presents. They represent tangible manifestations of God’s blessings. When God give you are present – a raise, a bonus, a great deal on something you want, don’t you get excited? When you do that for your kids, shouldn’t they?
I think so.

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4 Moms: Gift shopping for a crowd

No current giveaway. Shocking, right?

4 Moms, 35 Kids

I used to love going Christmas shopping at the mall.  I never really loved the mall itself, but the whole experience was part of Christmas for me.  It was very nearly the only time I went, because it was the only time I felt the need to visit 21 different non-grocery stores in the same week.  It was fun and exciting to haul 6 small children and a double stroller 45 miles on icy Ohio roads for an all day trip to the mall.  Part of the fun was using everyone’s coats to hide 42 gifts from 6 recipients without arousing suspicions of shoplifting, then trying to get everyone back to the minivan without freezing to death.  Motherhood does strange things to us.

Something has changed over the years, and I no longer feel the same need or desire to visit the mall.  Maybe I changed.  Maybe the internet changed me.  The mall is no longer the best place to do my gift shopping, and I no longer feel the least desire to set foot there.  I suspect my kids miss those days, but I haven’t asked because I just don’t want to go there.  If they read this post, I hope they won’t tell me how much they miss those days.

Now, the internet is my friend.  Instead of letting kids watch TV commercials to get gift ideas, we can browse the WORLD.  We can check reviews to make sure it’s as great as it the packaging makes it look.  We can find the best price anywhere on the best idea ever, and we can probably get free shipping with no sales tax.

This is great, since I am potentially shopping for a much bigger crowd now than ever before.  Did I say 42 gifts?  That was just one apiece from Dad and Mom to each child back when we had 6 kids, and one to each sib from the kids.  That doesn’t begin to consider the fact that I’m the oldest of 14 children and Perry is the oldest of 6.  I now have 10 children and something in the vicinity of 25 nieces and nephews, and we belong to a small, close knit church where most of the members exchange gifts.

How do I shop for a crowd?  We have done many things to simplify gift giving in large families:

  • Shop early and shop online. If you’re prone to stress at this time of year, do everything you can to avoid the last minute crush.  The longer your list is, the sooner you should start.  A little stress early in the game will help you avoid a lot of stress later on.
  • Give the same gifts within certain groups. Many loved ones receive gifts that are either similarly themed or identical: a custom designed calendar with family photos and birthdays (Costco had the best quality for the best price), homemade goodies, framed family portraits, or handcrafted items.   This alone can simplify things immensely.
  • Use your resources. My husband works at Vision Forum, which makes it especially easy for us to choose and buy gifts there for our loved ones.  You probably have special access to something that would make a great gift for others in different circumstances.
  • Arrange a gift exchange. We do this often for children with their cousins and sometimes for the adults in the extended family.  In a large group of children with a wide range of ages, it can be helpful to divide the children into 2 age groups, so children can choose a gift for someone in their own age range.
  • Give or contribute to a group gift or a family gift. We did this for our own children more than once.  Since they buy gifts for each other and receive from others outside the household, they still received many gifts but shared one big gift from me and hubby.  For extended family, we often give just one gift per household rather than one for each person.
  • Let go. Realize that you are not obligated to buy a gift for everyone you interact with or even everyone who gives you a gift.  Don’t feel guilty if they give you a gift and you don’t have one in return.  Just offer genuine thanks.  Like the gifts we receive from God, a Christmas gift is free, not something you earn with a gift of your own.
  • Eat a lot of chocolate. Or do whatever helps you unwind.  Try not to be a scrooge like I am.

I won’t say that Christmas shopping is stress free, but I will say that I feel a lot more sane than some of the people I see in WalMart this time of year.

The rest of the 4 Moms are buying gifts too:


Upcoming topics for 4 Moms:

  • December 22 – Q&A
  • December 29 - How to handle all those incoming gifts

Recent topics:

About 4 Moms, including a complete list of all past topics

 

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