The Basement and the Spoon

Ok, I’m not sure if this is method or madness, but here’s a fun little story.
When we lived up north, our house had a basement. It was a nice one as basements go, but still a little dark, a little dank, and generally creepy if you’re very young or somewhat timid. It wasn’t a place that our children wanted to be.
Our basement had a few notable features, among them a washer, a dryer, and a freezer. Ah, the freezer.
Common kid ice cream stayed on the ground floor, in the little freezer that made up the top of the fridge. Big buckets of store brand neapolitan, cookies-n-cream, chocolate. Good stuff, right?
But what lurked in the basement? Downstairs, alone in the cool darkness, is where I learned to love Moose Tracks, and Bear Claw, and other equally irrelevant Alaskan names for new permutations of chocolate and nuts and caramel.
Let’s just say that keeping up with laundry in those days was not a problem. I’m still a little surprised that they never asked why I needed a spoon to do laundry.


  1. Kim Brenneman says:

    Oh this is hilarious!!! I just finished a handful of chocolate chips myself. It’s the magnesium I need you know, ahem. There just isn’t enough magnesium in the prenatal vitamins. ; )

  2. okay, be honest kim, i knew you in your “i can’t afford ice cream worthy of hiding in the basement days”….in those days… was chocolate chips in the cupboard …..and folks, it was not nestle toll house or hersheys, no, it was ALDI! aldi chocolate chips….which, i’m sorry, are not the greatest to just snack on. they’re fine in cookies, but as i too have grown into the chocolate obsessiveness that is momhood, i have realized that some brands of chocolate chips are just not as good as others. i remember being invited over one night by kim….it was a late summer night. perry was working late, the kids were in bed, and the call came…..hey matti, she almost whispered into the phone……i got a little something chocolatey over here, thought you might want to come over for a few minutes. it was edy’s grand. it was very good. i knew then, that kim and perry were moving up in the world. aldi’s chocolate chips were on the way out. they were being replaced by a much more coveted competitor. soon, kim would be having edy’s several nights a week….and then, they got a freezer one day. and you know, there’s nothing quite like the site of stumbling into your neighbor’s back door and catching them bent over a freezer and quickly turning with a spoon stuck in their face and hair wrapped around the stem of the spoon! it was quite a vulnerable side of kim that i’d never seen before….she looked panic stricken almost that i was one of the kids and her secret was out. but she quickly recomposed and let me in on the secret. at the time, i wasn’t much of a chocolate fiend… weakness in life is pepsi. followed by chocolate and the close third which can be a first place would be the chocolate turtle cheesecake……mmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

  3. I can totally relate Kim..only I hid fun sized candy bars in an old jalepeno fries box in the freezer. The kids never wondered why I kept getting into the freezer late at night and then making a beeline to the bathroom. I’ll never tell!

  4. When my 12yo daughter sees me having a rough day, she nods sagely and takes me aside. “Mom,” she informs me gently, “You need ‘therapy.'” This is the code word for grown-up ice cream.
    She’s a smart one. I think she’s almost ready for therapy herself.

  5. Oh, That is hilarious. Mine still think M&M’s are moma’s “medicine”, I even still keep them in the medicine cabinet. They don’t even ask for them.

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