- Announce your intentions to the victim.
- Give a nuzzly kiss on the neck. Growl a little when you do this.
- Bite the neck on each side, right under the ears.
- Bite the tummy, but spit out the belly button.
- Count fingers to be sure your order didn’t get shorted.
- Starting at the fingers, eat each arm up to the armpit.
- Play “This Little Went to Market” with each foot. This verifies the toe count. Feel free to use a modified house version.
- Sniff the feet and exclaim in horror. You’re not eating those, are you?
- Eat them anyway. You can use mouthwash when you’re done.
- Gobble down all the rest as quickly as you can!
How to eat a baby in 10 easy steps
August 9, 2007 by 9 Comments