The other side of the quiverfull coin
We joyfully accept each and every child that God sends us, but not always with a perfect attitude. Sometimes I don’t feel quite ready to face morning sickness again; sometimes I wonder how the next infant seat will fit in our van, and where we’ll put another chest of drawers or another bed. I also wonder how the budget will look when we start paying for weddings. 
But sometimes my own challenges and struggles seem very small and selfish compared to those of others.
Being quiverfull-minded isn’t a contest to see who can have the most kids. It’s about trusting God and being content with the family that He gives us, whatever form it takes.
Sometimes it looks very different from our crew, even though we’re all on the same page. It’s good to be reminded of that and to bear one another’s burdens in any way that we can, even - or especially - when the burden is so different from our own. Go read Marci’s post about infertility to learn what it’s like to be on the other side of the quiverfull coin.
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Filed under: Christian living
Thank you for this link, Kim. It is nice (sad, but nice) to finally read a post from someone with an experience similar to mine (quiverfull-minded, with infertility).
Thank you,
Michele
We went to a family gathering this weekend, where a dear relative talked quite loudly about our supposid goal of “popping out babies as quickly as we could”.
Ouch. That is not the point! It’s a walk of faith, day by day….
This is a very real possibility of “quiverfull” that is not often acknowledged. Thank you for pointing out this hauntingly beautiful post . . . so much of God’s grace shows in it!
Thanks, Kim, for mentioning this link. In a situation like this (quiverfull-minded, yet dealing with infertility) it is so encouraging to have sisters in the Lord who have gone before us and remind us time and again of the Lord’s faithfullness. Thanks again!
Erna
Thank you so much for posting about this and linking to that story. I cried when I read it! After 14 years of marriage the Lord has blessed us with 3 children. Many times I have felt like less of a mother because I only have 3. Reading about others that struggle with this issue really helps. I have realized that I need to be grateful for what the Lord has given me. I need to focus on what I have, not on what I don’t. The Lord has given me 3 beautiful children to care for and train. I need to focus on that and not long for what He hasn’t given me. He knows what each of us needs and He will give us what He thinks best! Thanks again for dealing with this subject.
Kim
Thanks for this link, her blog is so well written and with such passion. I’m glad someone has focused on the true point of quiverful…NOT lots of children, but Trusting that the Lord will provide. Not just clothes and food and money to cover bills, but exactly the children that our family is meant to have.
We’ve lost three babies in the past two years. The first two were horrible, not just the physical pain, but the emotional anguish of death. The third was a gift from God, even losing him at 15 weeks because it was another opportunity to practice trusting in Him. We’re pregnant with number eight, and daily I have the cross to bear, of trusting in God and His plan, rather than fearing the outcome. Eight weeks down, thirty four to go!
This is one of the most “quiver full” testimonies I have ever read.
Thanks to Marci for sharing.
Perry C
Thanks for the focus– it’s important that people realize that behind the big families is a belief that God should be in control of a family, of a life. That’s important and cannot be said enough.
One of the best posts that I have ever read on the perspective of “resting” in the number of children He sends is here: http://raising-arrows.blogspot.com/2008/05/enjoying-your-quiverfull.html
It is not a competition to have more children than another, but rather, to lovingly receive all that He may send. Sometimes, my children have not come as quickly as I may have wanted, but it is then that I must fall at our Lord’s feet, and rest in His Will. Thankfully, His way is always perfect. Blessings!
Amazing post. Infertility is what brought us to the QF mindset. I am older and diabetic. The diabetes was undiagnosed for many years and was probably the reason I wasn’t conceiving and carrying a baby. I was nearly 38yrs old when I found out I was diabetic. By then I was so tired of wondering if I was pregnant, would I be pregnant, would I stay pregnant. So tired. So we prayed that God would give us however many children he wanted us to have. I was just too tired of worrying about that. I decided that given my age and health issues the number might well be 0 and mmmmaybe 1. Well, 8m later I got pregnant (and stayed that way) with my oldest and within 27.5m had 2 more babies. Total 3 babies. At 40+
No idea why God did that. No idea if any more will be coming my way. Just know we’re happy to have any and all he sends.
It’s not a ‘baby havin’ competition’. It’s a ‘you get what you get when God thinks you’re ready for it and be happy about that’ mindset.
–BethP
Thank you so much for sharing and for directing those to Marci’s post on this. We have 2 children that are adopted. I have had 2 miscarriages and an ectopic pregnancy that did result in a ruptured fallopian tube. I am totally quiverful minded. I have learned to rest in the fact that we will have the number of children that the Lord decides whether by birth or adoption. Either way HE controls it. It has been a very hard lesson in contentment for me.