He’s not a baby

The boy was 2 at the end of June and has shown very little interest in potty training.  It will be nice to have just one in diapers someday soon.  In the meantime we buy them in two sizes: Big baby and little baby.  I’m ok with that, but am trying to exert just a bit of subtle pressure.  The terminology itself is deeply meaningful.

One example is a conversation we had this morning.  Actually, we have this conversation once or twice a day.

Boy: Mom, I pooped.  Where are my man diapers?

Me: Men don’t wear diapers.  Men poop in the potty.  You need a baby diaper.

Boy: I’m not a baby!  Bethany is a baby!

Me: Well, do you want to poop in the potty like a man or wear baby diapers like Bethany?

Boy: [sigh].  Where are my diapers?

Comments

  1. How funny! Why is potty training such a big deal? There is the (very old) adage that, “most kids don’t start kindergarten in diapers….” So true. I go with the “3 is about right” camp myself….they just seem ready at that point.

  2. Sheila G.,
    New subscribers will receive an email with a confirmation link. They need to click through to confirm their subscription before they start receiving email updates.
    It’s a little cumbersome, but standard procedure to avoid spamming people who didn’t actually sign themselves up.

  3. Too cute! I had to copy this and email it to my mom. BTW I tried to sign her up to receive your updates but she isn’t getting them. She has email but no internet that is why I am trying to subscribe her instead of just sending her to your site.

  4. love the new look!
    great story.

  5. Anna,

    Touche’. Your childcare experience will undoubtedly be a blessing and an advantage to you as a new mom someday (I just had to learn everything as it happened with 1st child.) But I maintain that Kim is not lacking in this area of training and it is not “…WAY past time to train.” Rather she is intuitive, knowing her son’s desire to be a man like his daddy and using “a bit of subtle pressure” to persuade a positive outcome.

  6. Kim you’ve been down this road before and know whats right for your children. I have seen situations when the child gets to be over 3 and they go get the diaper lay down and say change me. That to me seems a bit off. I also hate when a parent says they can’t do it because the daycare won’t do it until a certain age. That is the situation with my nephew right now and it is driving me crazy who’s in charge mom and dad or the daycare??? Not that you have that issue either I am just saying.

  7. Hahaha I almost died laughing! But I know it is not always so funny when you are dealing with it. Mine son was almost 4 before we got him to poop in the potty. I had to make him wash himself and his dirty undies up. I feel for you .

  8. Anna,
    You didn’t step on my toes; I expect to hear differing opinions, and appreciate hearing from you – and the others who have commented.
    I also expect our boy to be in diapers a bit longer. I’d rather wait until he’s either thoroughly interested or thoroughly ready. I’m not convinced that either landmark has been reached yet, in spite of his vocabulary and desire to be grown up.

    Maryjo,
    You mentioned power struggles – I’m glad that your way has worked for you. In my opinion, our way seems like a good way to avoid rather than create those problems. I’m afraid I would find myself right in the middle of a power struggle if I tried to potty train my children before they were 2.

  9. Sheila,

    You are right, I am not a mother of any, but have been the caretaker of many, specifically the 2-3 crowd. I speak from that experience only, though it is a sizable one. Perhaps parents are better able to discern their childrens’ capacity to learn than a third party….or….publishing an apparent difficulty on the internet with the comment line open welcomes an opinion.

    ~Anna

  10. This is so cute! Don’t you love this age?

  11. This was hysterical! Sorry…..
    I know how hard it is waiting on them. My 2nd to youngest JUST toilet trained and will be 4 next month. Your lil guy seems very bright!

  12. hahahahahahahahahaha! That is the funniest conversation I’ve heard in weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kids are hilarious!

  13. LOL! how hysterical!!! i LOVE when children come up with things that are so obvious to soothe their ego or prove their point. we adults, do it so subtly, and hide it from others. but children just say it like they see it. “man diapers” just cracks me up. thanks for the smiles!

  14. Ha, that is funny, our two year olds are the same age and mine does not speak that well, let me tell you! We always say that he is “speaking in tongues” because nobody knows what he is saying but the Lord. Good luck with the potty training I am totally not there yet!

  15. LOL! I love it!

  16. Cute conversation I say. I never stressed about potty training my babies earlier than the next mama. Why should we care about what anyone else thinks about our private matters. Anyway a child will ease into using the bathroom according to their own unique personality and physical and mental readiness. So maybe little Perry is a sharp kid, that doesn’t mean it is necessary to force this milestone. He’ll get it soon enough- with or without unpleasantries thrown his way.
    (Anna, could it be that you do not know all the dynamics of these natural and delicate situations with children because you are not a mother yet? I would like to humbly and respectfully point out that when giving advice to a mother of MANY, experience with your own children probably matters.)

  17. oh Anna I agree with you whole heartedly when they come ask for a diaper its time. We are all differant though and thats what makes the world go around. My son was exactly 2 when he was trained and I had no problems. It only took one week. I think waiting till they are older so often causes a power strugle.

  18. Most of my girls were potty trained right around the age that he is now; none were earlier and I’ve heard that boys are often later, so I’m not at all impatient yet.
    But I do agree with Anna that he’s ready or very nearly ready now that he can talk about it. I’m just not convinced that he can “see it coming” yet. I think his verbal skills may be ahead of his…umm…other skills.
    I also think that psychological readiness can be an issue. For example, a 5 yo might be technically capable of washing 2 sinks full of dishes, but I wouldn’t expect her to have the maturity to tackle the job.
    I’m willing to wait until he’s fully ready. In the meantime, I’ll keep reminding him that he hasn’t reached manhood just yet.

  19. Maybe I am the jaded, no-nonsense pro-nanny, but when a kid can describe the contents of his diaper and ask for a new one, its WAY past time to train.

  20. Don’t lose heart. All 3 of my boys were potty trained at 3. Yes, 3 years old. This is actually a very common age for a boy.

  21. MamaNavyBrat says:

    Oh that conversation is just too cute. I’m so happy this one is potty training. He’s 21 months. Finally started to tell when he’s going to poop before it happens.

    My first two didn’t potty train until after 4 so I’m on cloud 9 with him wanting to train earlier than my girls.

  22. LOL!!!! We’re at the same point with our 2yo son. I’m determined to have him potty trained by the time the next baby comes (in June), otherwise, we’ll have three in diapers. Maybe once I’m over this dreadful morning sickness, I’ll get to it!

    oh, and FYI…..the beans didn’t work! UGH!

  23. I have almost the same conversation everyday with my recently turned 4 year old daughter. She has been potty trained for over a year, but refuses to poop in the toilet. She asks for a diaper and goes into the bathroom. If I refuse she will hold it. The doctor says there is only 2 things kids that age can control; what they eat and when they poop. He assures me that she will eventually use the toilet , but I have my doubts. Her 20 month old sister has used the potty chair several times already. The 4 year old is unimpressed by this and always says,”maybe tomorrow…” I have stopped stressing over it (for the sake of my sanity). I just remind myself (over and over and over) that I would rather be changing a diaper than swishing panties in the toilet. (I do think she would hold it before she would poop in her underwear).
    Enough about me, Boys are usually much later than girls in this area anyway, from what I’ve heard anyway. I have 4 girls. My girlfriends who have boys say they have all been almost 4 before bathroom skills were mastered.
    Much luck to you AND much patience!

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