Comments on: An open letter to working moms

By: joy-renée

joy-renée — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 16:54:53 +0000

YES.
Thanks for giving another side to this.

By: Michelle

Michelle — Sat, 05 Nov 2011 00:17:29 +0000

I have to chime in with the strangers and passersby who say that you are lucky. Well, not lucky… blessed.

I do completely agree with your post. Unfortunately, I really am the rare exception right now! My husband and I have our first on the way… and we are very young… and I am on Medicaid to “afford” having this precious baby. My husband is still in school/working part-time and I work two not very fruitful part-time jobs. We really don’t have a penny to spare (and yes, we have beaten and battered vehicles, no cable, we rent… etc! haha).

I longingly wait for the day when I can stay home with our little ones!

By: Stephanie

Stephanie — Fri, 02 Sep 2011 05:25:19 +0000

Ahhh I love this! I get this all the time “you are lucky you can stay home” yet those poeple live in near million dollar homes with speperate bedrooms for each child and drive the latest most expensive cars, it is so much better for your children if you raise them, not someone else.

By: Sue

Sue — Tue, 30 Aug 2011 00:44:36 +0000

I was a working mother. Not by choice, necessarily. I was a teacher before I met my husband and continued to teach while raising two daughters. I provided insurance for the family and most of the income. Had my husband had a good job I would have retired in a heartbeat. Lucklily my children attended the school where I taught. Now that I am retired I am very thankful that I had my job. I have a pension that allows my to help care for my grandchildren. Had I not taught I would probably be on public assistance. Sometimes we don’t get what we want but what we need.

By: kimc

kimc — Sat, 13 Aug 2011 14:59:00 +0000

Lisa, thank you for reading carefully enough to hear me say that some do have extenuating circumstances! So many readers in situations like yours get offended and assume I was including them.
God is good to provide for your family while your husband is injured, even if it’s not the way you would like it to happen.
Praise God from whom all blessings flow!

By: Lisa

Lisa — Sat, 13 Aug 2011 04:07:32 +0000

I used to be a SAHM for 5 years. Almost 7 years ago I had to go to work at our local grocery store. I still hate leaving every day, and there’s more days than not that I have to sit in the van for a few minutes before I go into work to compose myself and dry my tears. I miss being home with my babies and wish that things could be different. My husband has been out of work for 3 years now following a knee injury that required complicated surgery. Things didn’t heal right and unfortunately he’s no longer able to do the kind of work he’s done all his life (construction). I kind of saw this coming and took steps to become the manager of my department which required odd hours for about a year, BUT now I write my own schedule, have the flexibility I need, and have a few extra minutes every day to call home to say hi. We still homeschool, with my husband teaching some subjects and me teaching the rest when I get home. It’s tiring, and it would be easier if he was working or if the kids were in public school, but after much soul searching and listening to God we feel that we’re doing what’s best for us right now. Thanks for your article (that I’ve read and reread I don’t know how many times!) and hopefully it’ll serve as a reminder to others that those who CAN stay home with their babies need to be thankful.

By: kimc

kimc — Fri, 22 Jul 2011 03:34:32 +0000

Brit,
I’m sorry if this felt like it was pointed at you. It was meant for those who choose to work because they don’t want to make the sacrifices necessary to stay home, then feel as is they had no choice. Some people – a few people – truly have no choice. If you are one of those, please accept my apologies and know that I don’t claim to know the circumstances of those I meet.

By: Brit @MomAnswersWithBrit.com

Brit @MomAnswersWithBrit.com — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 19:06:47 +0000

I feel hurt by this post, but I know it wasn’t your intention!

I am one of those people that would say, “you’re so lucky/blessed.” I think some SAHM mom’s assume that not all the necessary sacrifices have been made.

I am willing to give up every, the only debt we have is our house and student loans. We’ve tied to sell our house, but after a year nothing has happened because of the market. Even if we did sell it, the rent around here for a much, much smaller place is $200 less than our payment now. With my husband out of work, and our student loan/mortgage debt we can’t even begin to pay the bills (let alone food) with the income my husband is bringing in.

When I see a SAHM mom, I assume that they make a ton of sacrifices, because I know that if (when) I stay home the sacrifices are just a given. I say, “you’re lucky/blessed” because even after all of the sacrifices you can STILL stay home, which is what I want more than anything!

Please don’t assume everytime you see a working mother that they aren’t willing or haven’t already made the necessary sacrifices.

By: kimc

kimc — Sun, 17 Jul 2011 03:53:56 +0000

Momofmany, I think you missed my point. The letter was not intended for mothers who self consciously choose to work like you. It was for those who talk as if they had no choice – but might, if they were willing to make some hard choices.

By: momofmany

momofmany — Sun, 17 Jul 2011 00:23:54 +0000

I appreciate your opinion, but I think you are overgeneralizing. I was a stay at home for the past 12 years. I have 5 children ranging from 5-12 yrs old. This past year, I received my Bachelors in Counseling from a wonderful Christian college. I was recently hired as a child welfare worker through our state. Do I have to work…absolutely not, my husband makes well more than enough money for my family. However, I have a passion for the lost, helping children in the foster care system, and helping parents become successful parents. God has put this desire in my heart from the time I was a little girl. While my children were young, I followed my heart and fostered over 60 children in my home. Yes it is tough juggling all aspects of my life, but without a shadow of a doubt, I know that God has placed me right where he wants me to be. My children are so proud when they tell someone that their mom is a social worker that protects children and families.
Everyone has their own opinion about staying at home and working, but please don’t put others down for their choice. And yes, I am a born-again Christian, so this is not coming from someone who has a chip on their shoulder against christianity. God bless you in your endeavors.