Parker is settling into life on the outside quite well, except for the part where we sleep at night and stay awake during the day. Yes, I’m spoiled that way. I’ve never had a baby wake me more than twice during the night. Never until Parker came along. He eats every 2-3 hours during the day, but more like every hour at night. He’s punishing me for the ease of my past life. I’m sure of it.
Yes, I try to nap when I can during the day, but am I the only mom who finds it difficult to relax and let go of consciousness while there are children running around doing STUFF? What are they doing? Is anyone watching the little ones? Did Dad remember to take his lunch? Have the chickens been let out? When did Bethany’s diaper get changed last? Is she wearing a diaper? And would somebody PLEASE GET THAT DOG SOME WATER SO SHE’LL STOP BARKING AT THE BATHTUB?
If you’re wondering how that is affecting me, you should have seen this post before I fixed the typos. I thought briefly about leaving them in to illustrate the point, but just couldn’t make myself do it. Anyway, you probably wouldn’t have gotten the point because it would be totally incoherent. Like me.
At any rate, I’m thinking of trying drugs – caffeine, to be specific. Normally I don’t drink real coffee because after just a cup or two for a day or two, I become so dependent upon the caffeine that I get withdrawal headaches.
For Parker, however, I’m ready to do it. For the sake of sleep – the mere possibility of sleep – sleep at night, to be specific – I’ll risk a migraine or two.
My hope is that if I drink a cup of real caffeine-laden coffee first thing in the morning, each morning, maybe the little darling will stay awake more during the day. Then he’ll have to make up for lost sleep by actually sleeping at night.
It’s a beautiful plan, right? Please tell me it makes sense. If you already tried and it didn’t work, please don’t tell me that part. There’s nothing more tragic than the murder of a beautiful plan by a brutal horde of facts. Or something like that. It’s a quote, no doubt mangled beyond recognition by my sleep-deprived brain.