4 Moms Q&A: Author of Large Family Logistics answers questions!

4 Moms 35 Kids answer questions about big familiesAbout 4 Moms, including a complete list of all past topics

Here it is, folks!  The first edition in our 5 part series on the book, Large Family Logistics by blogging mom of 10 Kim Brenneman.

This week we have 3 special surprises for you!

First, we usually have a q&a for the 4th Thursday of every month but this time Kim Brenneman is the one answering questions!

Our complete list of Q&A will be divided among not just 4, but 5 blogging moms of many – Kim Brenneman is joining us for this event!

Here are 3 questions to kick things off:

Question: What’s your best advice for a mom of many with teens?

Kim’s Answer: Pray pray pray. Don’t get caught up on the little things. Choose your battles. Stay calm and relaxed. Listen closely. Listen some more. Don’t settle for the quick answers. Draw them out. Remember what it felt like to be that particular age. Pay attention to what is going on in their life.  Keep them busy and focused on developing their particular interests and strengths. Help them see that they can complement each others’ strengths and weaknesses and develop teamwork. Help them create a family business. A good question for teens and adult children that I just learned from an older and wiser friend, “How does _______ fit your worldview?” Everything centers around a person’s worldview. Keep them challenged. Don’t quit now.

Question: Do you regularly dedicate a day to each task every week or do you sometimes just wing it for weeks and months on end?

Kim’s Answer: Life works better when each day has a task. When life is busy we will put tasks off but we can do it with confidence knowing that next week or month we will do that task. Winging it makes for a chaotic situation and everyone in the family is happier and more secure with order. God’s creation is full of order. Every time I teach a child about the multiplication table I am again amazed. Or biology and how cells work. How our bodies work. To wing it is not God’s best and things in life break down when we let busy-ness or ill planned days go on for too long. When we restore order life goes more smoothly for everyone in the house.

Question: How do you find the strength, energy and motivation to keep going when every tasks seems so never ending?

Kim’s Answer: Pray. Read the Bible. Take my vita-pills. Drink water. The work isn’t going anywhere. It just gets deeper. I’d rather clean up a little mess than a big one. And learn to accept that certain things are never done. They will need to eat, wear clothes, and have a bowl to put their oatmeal in.


Visit the other 3 4 Moms to see the rest of the questions and answers!

Large Family Logistics book for moms of many

Second surprise: Kim Brenneman will be visiting our blogs to answer more questions in the comments!  If you have a question you’d like her to answer, leave it here.  Of course Kim can’t promise to answer every single question right away, but she will address as many as she can.

And finally, the third surprise for this week: The 4 Moms have an exclusive promo code to save you 40% on your own copy of Large Family Logistics!

Vision Forum promo code: 4MOMS
exp. Thursday, Aug 4.

Order quickly and you can have your own copy in time to link up when we start blogging through the book next Thursday!


Upcoming topics for 4 Moms:

  • August 4 – Book blogging linky: Large Family Logistics, part 1: foundations and methods
  • August 11 – Book blogging linky: Large Family Logistics, part 2 (chapters 18-27: planning your week)
  • August 18 – Book blogging linky: Large Family Logistics,  part 2b (chapters 28-47: the nitty gritty details)
  • August 25 – Book blogging linky: Large Family Logistics, appendices
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    Comments

    1. Hi Jenna,

      We make the child repeat the words in a pleasant voice and we demonstrate what a pleasant voice sounds like. We don’t give the child what he wants until he can “say it in a nice voice”.
      Sometimes we will repeat what he said in a whiny voice so he will “hear” what he sounds like but I don’t like to do that too often. It sounds a lot like mocking and it’s soooo horrible on my own ears. ICK. But it will make them open their eyes. ; ) Maybe cause we don’t do it too often.
      Now sometimes they start whining just cause they are hungry, thirsty, tired and need to go to bed. We warn them but don’t get too upset but just get them a drink, bread & butter, and into bed as quick as possible. And tell them to wake up happy! : ) With a smile.

    2. hi Kim!

      Not sure if you’re still answering questions, but I’ve got one for you if you are 🙂 I’ve been reading your book the past few days and LOVE all the helpful tips. Right now I have a three year old daughter and one year old son. In your book you say that you don’t allow whining in your home, and boy are we having a hard time with our three year old whining. Do you have any tips for getting her to kick this habit? We talk about the Bible verse that says to do everything without complaning and arguing, but still when she starts whining she can’t seem to stop. I’d love some ideas! Thanks!

    3. Liz p –
      First ndispendable tool would be The Bible, next one is prayer, third – pencil and paper for menu plans, chore charts, To Do lists

      Katie –
      It certainly does get easier to have alone time and dates when the older kids are able to babysit. In the meantime, plan for an evening where you make the evening time after the kids are in bed special. Put them to bed early if you can. Go sit outside for a different setting. Or create an indoor nook for your date nights. Better would be if you could do something like that every evening… but reality enters. There was a season when Matt and I stayed up late and watched an old movie one night of the week. We have our best talks in the late evening when we’re sitting on the front porch. : ) Lots of times the simplest is the best.

      Kristen S –
      It sounds like you enjoy food and menu planning. And that you’ve got that nailed. Perhaps focus on simplifying it (I say that without seeing it so disregard if I’m off-base) or consider rotating the same menu or series of menus so that it doesn’t take as much time. A winter set, a spring set, etc.
      Think about the routines that you already have going with your children that work and enter them into your Daily Plan (quick – with a pencil if need be). Then build on either side of the things that are working. Build it bit by bit. Then you will be stronger and won’t quit. Definitely enter an Afternoon Choretime.
      My personal struggle has always been laundry. I keep it under control when I have switching loads attached to other events such as “before breakfast” “Lunch Hour”. Once you have started on a firm Daily Plan you will find more time in your day. And once that Daily Plan is a regular routine, add a Weekly Plan bit by bit. Once your Home Management Book is put together then you will have a THING that gives you a sense of accomplishment that will have a significant impact on each day from here on out. WOO HOO!!! : ) I love that feeling too. Start with a Daily Plan, a list of events for each day to give order. And Pray over it!
      With little children, keep the amount of toys minimal and to creatvie toys. Give the rest away – they’re only causing you stress when you have to get them put away. Keep the toys they actually play with. Keep the amount available to play with to an amount that they can put away in ten minutes. Quick vacuum the floor as soon as the toys are picked up. Clean the bathroom while you watch them in the bathtub. Give your children a wet rag and have them “clean” while you are cleaning or working in the kitchen. Have them help you sort laundry, switch loads, they can fold towels. Keep happy music on. Read the Bible and good books to them every day.

    4. Thank you for the promo code! I was finally able to order it myself (versus borrowing it from friends) and will be looking forward to it! Thanks Kim & 4Moms!!

    5. Subscribing to comments…thanks! 🙂

    6. Hi Kim,
      I bought your book about a month ago, and I LOVE IT…the problem is that I don’t know where to start! I have 3 young children (so far), including a newborn. I KNOW that God wants me to better my home and organization skills, I just feel very overwhelmed. The minute I get one thing organized, another thing is 10 times worse!
      Do you have a starting point or recommend where I should start?
      I have my binder w/ blank inserts ready for my Home Management Binder, but they are all blank! I do a menu plan on my blog, but it seems to take a full hour to get it all done…which leaves no time after the kids are up to work on anything else.
      Just looking for something that will make me feel good, like I accomplished something and not something that makes me feel like I am falling farther behind.
      Thanks so much, and God Bless you for your book!
      Kristen

    7. Primarily subscribing. 🙂 I have gotten a lot of ideas and encouragement from LFL blog over the years, and bought the book soon after it was out. It is a keeper! I have a whole shelf of home/time management books, but LFL will be my go-to from here on out.

      Not making the plan, but working the plan, is my main hurdle.

    8. Hi Kim!!! I LOVE your book, couldn’t put it down for like 2 weeks when I first got it, lol, and I have implemented all kinds of new strategies I got from it. =) We have 4 children (so far) and really one of the hardest things my husband and I deal with is having time alone. After we put the kids to bed, we only have a couple hours before we’re falling asleep mid-sentence. We don’t feel comfortable hiring a sitter and we have no relatives nearby to help, so we’re just on our own with this. How have you handled this, or is it just a season to get through until our oldest (now 7) is able to babysit?

    9. Is there a tool or two you have found indispensable?

    10. Liz p –
      Before you sit down to work on a making a plan, put your children to a task or game or distracting play thing. This is the time when toy rotation helps out. If the legos have been put away for a couple of months, getting them out will keep them very occupied while you put your menu, chore charts, etc. onto paper. Other strategies would be to get up early and work on it before the children get up. The house is VERY QUIET at 4am. Drink some coffee and you’ll get a ton of work done in a couple of hours of quiet. Take a nap later when they need a Quiet Hour. Perhaps you need to work on behavior or character for a bit before you can assign them to do work or play without your supervision. Role play games are great for training good behavior.

    11. I give up, I tried for 30 minutes to order this book, but the VF site wouldn’t let me order it. Very frustrating!

    12. ?gning of chores/menu planning etc without the house falling apart and children into mischief in the meantime? I know that some things can be reused (like reusing a 4 week menu cycle) but those things need to be re-done periodically. (for example, I’ve just been writing chore checklists for our family. All the steps that need to be completed for any given job. Not a job I’ll likely have to repeat in a hurry but in the mean time the children got into mischief and the housework isn’t doing itself!).

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    1. […] helpful book Large Family Logistics is answering questions from readers on five different blogs! Click here to head over to Life ina Shoe to get started reading and for the links to the other […]

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