If you’ve never asked yourself this question, you probably don’t homeschool. If you weren’t standing in the wreckage of a hurricane or tornado when you asked, you probably have less children than the average Lithuanian.
My husband’s tongue-in-cheek answer was, “Work the kids like rented mules.” He’s teasing, but a big part of the answer is teaching children to be efficient and effective helpers.
As usual, there is more than one answer, and my own solution may not be the best for your family. It may not even be the best for my family, but I’m just telling it like it is.
Play Leap Frog With Housework
Where no oxen are, the crib is clean: but much increase is by the strength of the ox. ~Pr. 14:4
Our house is often a mess. It’s often neat and clean, too. We don’t keep on top of housework; we play leap frog with it. We work on school and various projects, and when the mess gets too big we take a break to clean up our messes. Then we start a new mess. This sometimes happens 6 or 8 times in the course of a day. Does it sound better if I smile and say it’s a family tradition that goes back generations? I won’t tell you whose side of the family I credit, because no matter what I say somebody will be mad at me.
We find that our start-and-stop cleaning technique works best if we do it before the house is an overwhelming mess. I just downloaded a tiny free app for my phone called Watch Beep. It does one simple thing: beeps on the hour. I have high hopes that this will remind us to take a look around and put out small fires before they become big enough to choke our thought processes, because most of us just don’t work well in the midst of chaos.
Enjoy Division of Labor
Many hands make light labor.
I’ve said it so many times I could take credit for making it a cliche, but this phrase rings so true for the large family! Not only is cleanup faster and easier with 12 or 20 hands, it’s much more enjoyable. Some moms make games of cleanup to encourage their children to help, and sometimes I wish I were that sort of mom. Even without games, working together with those you love most can be a pleasure. It can be a challenge to manage a work crew made up of toddlers and preschoolers (a lot like herding cats) but it’s a joy on the days when you see them work together with a common purpose and a good will.
My husband’s tongue-in-cheek answer to the question of how to keep up was, “Work the kids like rented mules.” He’s teasing, but
Lower Your Standards
It’s standard advice to the mom of young ones, or the mom of many. It fits just as well for the homeschooling mom. That’s not to say you shouldn’t be concerned if you find…well, you know when to worry. But don’t feel guilty if your house is a little disheveled during the day. If your family has clean underwear in their drawers, food in their bellies, and you don’t need a machete to cut a path across the living room, chances are you’re doing OK.
Check Your Standards
Make sure your standards are in line with those of your husband. If you feel like your house is never clean enough, find out if it’s clean enough for him. Maybe you are wasting energy trying to impress the neighbors, who probably don’t even notice because they don’t come over. Maybe you are stressing over nothing.
On the other hand, maybe your husband wants a little more sparkle. Maybe things are looking a little rough around the edges and you need to put more effort into cleaning. If this is the case, you need to decide whether you just need more motivation (knowing your husband’s desires should do the trick!) or more hours in your day. Maybe you need to get his input on balancing priorities. Are you short on time because you spend too much on the computer? (ouch!) Does he think the children to learn to help more? Maybe certain portions of your current curriculum can be put on hold or skipped altogether. Discuss with your husband and come up with a solution that makes both of you happy.
Check Your Schedule
If you’re having trouble keeping up with the basics, chances are that homeschooling is not the whole problem. Make sure you know where your time is going, and use it wisely. I just started a series on procrastination, and it’s forcing me to take a long, hard look at my own habits. I suspect that’s why my own hubby thought the series was such a spectacular idea in the first place. He tricked me! Argh!
The other 4 Moms are offering up advice too.
Upcoming topics for 4 Moms:
- October 13 - Tips on keeping the food budget in control as prices rise
- October 20 - How do you find time for projects that need to be done, require focused attention and which the children can’t help with?
- October 27 - Q&A (watch Facebook for an invitation to post your questions)
Recent topics:
- September 1 - 4 Moms practice patience in the midst of chaos
- September 8 - 4 Moms make lunch for the menfolk {linky}
- September 15 - 4 Moms talk style (parenting style, that is)
- September 22 - 4 Moms Q&A: the attack of the shoe monster, socialized homeschoolers and more
About 4 Moms, including a complete list of all past topics
Winners of last week’s giveaway:
David’sKate won God’s Word from A to Z
Joni won her choice of Jamie Soles’s 3 albums of Psalms
Many thanks to all who entered!
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Thanks for a great post. Sometimes I wonder if my standards are too low…heh heh..but at least nothing is growing or living in the corners or under beds. I think as women, especially women who stay at home, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves feeling like we HAVE to have a clean house all the time. I never have and never will be a clean freak, so I’ve learned to give up on that one. I figure as long as I’ve read the Bible and have played with the kids, I don’t have to be ashamed of having some clutter and dirty dishes and/or (ok..usually and) some dirty laundry on the waiting list.
Thanks so much … this is great. Sometimes I have a hard time giving myself the grace that our life deserves … I mean, clean is great and important — but clutter free? Well, not so much and that might just need to be okay sometimes.
Wow my family ancestory is the royal family of Lithuania and I definately have way more children than that average. LOLOLOLOLOLOL
You are so right about checking with your husband about the cleanliness of the house! Mine informed me that I didn’t clean enough a couple months ago. I was shocked, so I immediately started cleaning like a mad woman. Every day I made sure it sparkled by bedtime (he works until midnight). Then, just two weeks ago I was stressed because my knees were swollen and I couldn’t do anything. At that point my husband kindly informed me that I don’t have to sweep and mop the floors every other day and clean the bathroom every night. All he wanted was the kitchen table to be cleared off and wiped down (I tend to leave piles of papers, mail, and books on the table…where else can I put it with no desk?). For weeks I was stressing about a spotless home, and all he wanted was my junk off the table!
I am just now discovering how much it helps to have a team for clean up. It’s great! My kids are 5, 3 and 1 and I’ve really noticed how much it helps now that the 1yo is pitching in. She loves to be a part of what the big kids are doing and it makes it way more fun for them to have a baby helping out! My favorite is watching her carry dishes from the dishwasher to her big sister who puts them away. Just one of the perks of having more kids than the Lithuanian average!