Househunting: the decision (part 1)

I’ve mentioned several times recently that we were looking at houses, seriously considering a move into town.  This wasn’t an abrupt decision; it’s one we’ve toyed with for a long time.  Due to increased traffic, Perry’s 52 mile daily commute (that’s 52 miles each way) has crept from 50 minutes to 75 minutes or more.  Over the course of the last nine years, that’s a lot of lost time.

So this time when Perry asked what I thought about moving to town, I tried to restrain my knee jerk reaction.  I like living in the country, and adjusting to having nearby neighbors will take time, but country living comes at a high cost.  Instead of cringing at the loss of privacy and the house we built together and the amazing view and the deer in the front yard, I told him that I would be happy where God put us.  If he thought he’d be happier in town, I knew I could be happy there too.

You know what?  Once I had resolved to have a good attitude, my entire outlook changed.  The more I thought about it, the more I liked the idea.

Perry wasn’t the only one losing hours in his day.  As the kids get older, we find ourselves with more and more activities in town.  And as our family grows and appetites increase, it’s becoming necessary to go to town just for groceries more and more often.

Country living is a grand thing, but the cost in gas, time and auto maintenance had become pretty grand, too, and over time we began to question whether it was the best stewardship of the resources God has given us.

Living so far out also puts a big damper on fellowship.  It’s hard to get people to make the drive, and I have to admit to a twinge of guilt every time I ask them.  In the same spirit, I can’t help but see dollar signs whenever we receive an invitation.  It’s terrible, but it’s true.  You want us to come for dinner?  That’s very generous of you to feed 12 guests, but it’s also going to cost us $30-40 in gas.  I hate thinking that way, but somebody has to fill the gas tank.

And inextricably tied into the fellowship issue is our church.  Our church is in town, along with nearly all of our church friends and church activities.  It’s hard to be deeply involved in a church that is an hour away, or with a church family that is an hour away.  We wanted – needed – to be geographically closer.

And so we started looking at houses.  It wasn’t the first time we’ve taken a look at what was available in the San Antonio area, but it may have been the first time we were serious about it.

cont’d here: Househunting: disappointment (part 2)


  1. Kim!!!! We want details on the new house! Ya know, how many bedrooms, bathrooms, large yard/small yard, did you end up with more sq. ft., etc.? I’m excited for you and the family. A new baby and a new house in the same month! How exciting!

    Blessings and love to you and yours! T.J.

  2. We are moving this weekend for a very similar reason. My hubby bought the company he has been working for (he’s a civil engineer) just this past fall. The commute prior wasn’t a huge deal. Now that he owns it – he’s gone A LOT. We live 60 minutes from his work. We also live on 100 acres right next to his parents and grandfather…in the middle of nowhere and LOVE it. However, the Lord provided the PERFECT house for us on the PERFECT piece of property a mere 10 minutes from my hubby’s work. We were so very truly blessed and cared for by God with this purchase and move.

  3. We live in the greater SA area also. The traffic is getting ridiculous. My hubby was working near the airport and driving in – but now he’s working in Seguin and while the mileage is not a lot less, the time and aggravation is. We had to drop out of some things as gas prices rose, but we’re really better off with more time at home.

  4. My family is in the same boat, it’s $30 per trip into town for us. We’ve toyed with the idea of moving into town to save gas, but the cost of living is so much higher in city limits, it would negate gas savings! Plus, “town” is Las Vegas and I don’t want my kids around the billboards all the time. For now, we’re just sucking it up and trying to minimize trips.

  5. I’m glad to hear your reasons, even though after reading your blog for quite awhile, I guessed already. I understand it, but boy do I wish we could just take your country house off your hands! Although the San Antonio area is NOT my favourite part of North America…

  6. We are trying desperately to find a place to rent nearer to our church fellowship. We looked for 7 YEARS(!) to find a church we agreed with doctrinally and now that we’ve found it, we want to be able to attend everything and really fellowship with the other families. Our drive is an hour and a half each way!

  7. “I told him that I would be happy where God put us.” Saying yes to our husbands is saying yes to God. Sometimes country life seems the utopia but God puts us where He wants us to glorify Himself. Encouraging words, Kim. I Look forward to the “rest of the story” along with pictures of your new home and how God is blessing your family! Praying for you as you draw close to D-Day!! 🙂

  8. I understand this more than you know. Family dynamics change and more. Life changes and it is good to adapt. We have toyed with the town idea but I just cannot leave these 40 acres… So we are happily staying here. You can always come visit us if you need to come see the country 🙂 but that would be a ton of gas money all the way to Michigan. Excited to see pictures of your new home!!!

  9. Is there any way to have the best of both worlds? We live about 10 minutes from town and it allows us to be in the country without having a long commute for work or homeschool/homechurch activities. Sometimes the area you live in doesn’t give you this option though. I have to say though that gas costs keep me from going to town any more than I need to. Praying you find a great house that still gives you some of the privacy you want and meets all of your needs. Happy house hunting!

  10. Thank you for showing us a picture of what everyday “submission” looks like.

    “So this time when Perry asked what I thought about moving to town, I tried to restrain my knee jerk reaction…….You know what? Once I had resolved to have a good attitude, my entire outlook changed.”

  11. Prayer request–little Gabriel 8 was recently diagnosed with cancer (ALL Leukemia– the “good” kind). Full recovery is expected but it’s a 3 year journey. All of our ambitious plans for the homeschool year have been given up such as suzuki violin, piano, etc. to focus on basics after much preparation and planning. So it’s been a huge adjustment on many fronts combined with complicated pregnancy that may end in bedrest. Tough logistics all the way around. 🙁

    any other large families deal with leukemia that you know of?



      video of Gabe “hangout” with his brothers and sisters via video call in hospital–I thought you’d like the tech angle, Kim!

    • Check out Sandi Queen of The Queen Homeschool. (They offer Charlotte Mason materials.) The Queens’ son went through cancer and they have some information about their journey as a large hs family dealing with cancer. I have a Cd about HS through Difficult times. (Our oldest has had very serious struggles with insulin dependent diabetes and celiac disease ; he was hospitalized 9 times in one year — each time In the ICU. We only have 4 kids, but in addition to hs I work as a nurse every weekend.) I am pretty sure that the Queens have more info about hs with cancer. I also believe the dad of Raising Real men (Hal Young) has cancer.

      I pray that your family grows closer together and to the Lord in this terrible time.

  12. I couldn’t agree more with the thought of gas costs. We don’t technically live in the country, but we live on the far west side of SA…..which is out of city limits, and quite far from most things and friends. Every time I go out, especially in our 15 pass van, I think about how much it will cost in gas. Though it’s probably the responsible thing to do, it hinders the joy of going somewhere sometimes.

    Anyway, so glad you all found something. Can’t wait to hear the details on the house. Maybe we’ll actually meet sometime soon! 🙂

  13. Tell me more! I own a real estate brokerage in DC and VA and now full time in Wilmington NC–can’t wait to hear about your journey. Often it is years in the making. We’re expecting #7 in March.

    For large families the real estate hunt is more challenging for sure!

    Kim, I have the Galaxy S3 android now and it’s the bomb! Please tell me you didn’t switch to iPhone 🙂

  14. We are house hunting too. My husband just took a new job in Boulder, CO and we’re about to put our house on the market. Moving from Virginia to Colorado has always been a dream of ours, but now we have to find a house in an area we have never lived. So many decisions. I’m thankful the Lord is going before us!

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