Three funnies from one tired mom

Calvin is not the easiest baby.  I’ve been running very short on sleep, which is part of the reason I’m not blogging regularly right now.  Proof?

Last week I was standing in front of the mirror and Perry Boy caught a glimpse of my reflection.  He jumped and did a double-take.  “Whoa!  You look creepy when your eyes are tired!”

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There has been a bucket of candy in the pantry for the last month, and Parker is having a lot of trouble resisting the temptation.  We leave the light off to discourage him, but it doesn’t work.  The little boy who wakes terrified of the dark in his room every night loves to be in the pitch black pantry.  Every time somebody opens the pantry door, he comes scurrying out like a little mouse.  “I not eat candy!  I not eat candy!”

After the first 96 candy raids and 95 swats, I realized there was a problem with this plan.  He had obviously decided that a piece of candy was worth a swat, so I started making him spit it in the trash when he was caught in the act.  This morning he came to me on his own, grinning as the chocolate drool ran down his chin: “I not eat candy, Mom.  I spit it in the trash.”

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Perry Boy loves to look at Calvin & Hobbes books during naptime.  I haven’t decided yet if it’s a great idea, but it does create some teachable moments.  Last week he asked me, “Mom? Can I please-just-one-time-quick take a bath in toilet?”

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How have your kids made you laugh recently?

Comments

  1. Haha I have twin sisters, younger than me. One day a few years ago, Gianna, one of the twins, asked Mom and Dad’s permission to have some little chocolate candy pieces. They said she could have one. She started to whine and they said, “You can have one, or none.” Instantly she perked up and smiled, taking her candy with her. Mom looked at Dad and smiled. “Aw, she handled that well. I’m glad she knows she’s needs to have a good attitude.” A few minutes later, my 12 yr. old brother walks in, asking for extra candy. Mom and Dad told him no. “But Gianna has a whole bunch!” He complained. Mom and Dad gasped and immediatly called Gianna, wondering why and how she could possibly have gone so directly against their wishes. When they asked she teared up and said, “Ohhhh! I thought you said I could have one or NINE!” Mom couldn’t help but giggle and said, “So that’s why she had such a good attitude!” We’ve never quit teasing Gianna ;)

  2. My 5 y.o. is a big Calvin & Hobbes fan and yesterday he asked me if I will please make him a hamburger casserole. Now I KNOW this is something that he would not like to eat, so I’m very puzzled about this. I asked him if he thought he would eat it and like it and he assured me that he would. I asked him how he knew that he would and he said, “Calvin says it tastes like puke.” I busted out laughing because obviously, he doesn’t know what puke is or he wouldn’t be asking for hamburger casserole.

  3. Merle Turner says:

    Kids are the same the world over most of the time smart and funny.
    Merle….

  4. Heather Wawa says:

    I love the funny stories our sleep deprivation and little kids provide! Those toddlers are a challange when Mom is tired!

    My son is 9 weeks and has colic. In my lack of sleep, I wrote “Splip Tea Soup” instead of “Split Pea Soup” on my menu plan and I caught myself just in time, putting the gallon of milk away in the cup cubboard.

    This too shall pass – they are worth every missed minute of sleep!

  5. Love it!

    My 4yo recently had a slice of cake with BRIGHT orange frosting. Later I mentioned the “orange dye in the frosting on the cake” to my husband, and ds immediately asked “Something died in the cake?”

  6. Hahaha! LOVE story no. 2! My husband and I both really enjoyed that one!

  7. My 8yo loves Calvin and Hobbes, and I’m not so sure it’s a great idea either. He is autistic, and so he is very literal and has a hard time understanding that something might be funny but still naughty. He lost the books for a long time after repeated trying to start a GROSS club in our backyard, lol. I have finally given them back, guardedly…next time they go for good!

  8. I keep “funny books” for 7 of my kids (the baby only says Mama so far which doesn’t qualify), but the others? I’m so glad I’ve kept them. Here’s a couple recent ones both from our 5yo boy:

    “Mom you’re gorgeous!” “Thanks!” I replied, rather surprised. He pauses, then asks, “What does ‘gorgeous’ mean?”

    A huge stretch Hummer limo drove past and our son was very impressed as it drove off he exclaimed, “WOW! I wonder how many kids they have?!” :)

    Oh, and our last baby was not easy either (still isn’t!) and the dark circles under my eyes reached new heights (or lows). So don’t apologize for your lack of blogging, Kim! We can always catch up on sleep and blogging when we’re 80 right?!

  9. we miss you…..when my son was little he said whats for dinner I said venison. He got all upset and said I dont want any medicine.

  10. Oh my ~ thanks for sharing!!!

    The other day one of my 6 year old twins was singing “Hark the FERAL angels sing…” !

  11. Toddlers and candy and their tenacity. We have a few traditional sweets in the house now as well. Our cute 2 a girl had to watch the family have treats yesterday while she got none. She had gotten into said candy the day before and got a sugar high- wouldn’t go to bed until having several unpleasant moments with daddy. But I guess chocolate is worth it:)

  12. Am I the only one that noticed that your funny stories only include the boys? ;)

  13. I hope you and yours enjoyed a wonderful time of thanksgiving in your new abode.
    Those are very amusing stories. What if you moved the candy to a big bowl out on the kitchen counter and still told him he wasn’t to have any. That way he’d be tempted out in the light and not in the dark. God sees us either way. I’d be curious to see if it made a difference. Sneaking in the dark versus being tempted out in the open. He might lose interest. Maybe it wouldn’t be as much fun. I don’t know. Just delete this…move on…you and your husband are good parents. : j

  14. I bet you could cure him from being afraid of the dark bedroom if you’d hide candy in the deepest darkest under-bed or back-of-closet. Just a thought.

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