I got to choose a new gun for Christmas.  Surprised?  You shouldn’t be.  Gun sales reached an all-time high during the 2011 holiday season, so maybe you are the odd one because you didn’t get a gun.

This wasn’t my first gun.  When I was 15, my dad bought me a Smith & Wesson model 19 .357 Combat Magnum with a nickel finish and a 2.5″ barrel.  I loved it then, and I still love it just as much.  I was annoyed at the time when he handed it to me then immediately announced that I was required to buy new grips to replace the cheap wood ones out of my own very limited funds, but when I complied I found that I loved the gun twice as much.  As usual, Dad was right.  My Hogue Monogrip made it feel and sound and shoot like an entirely different weapon, and it was beautiful.

My old gun has a big frame which makes it very comfortable to shoot.  The weight helps absorb the recoil, unlike the smaller lightweight guns designed for carrying and concealing.  There’s a downside to a big gun, though.  Although I usually wear it around the house, it’s heavy and very tricky to conceal in normal clothing.

I recently visited some gun shows looking for a holster that would allow me to conceal my gun.  Responses ranged from raised eyebrows to, “Honey, you’ve got a hand cannon.  You’re not going to hide that!”

I got my concealed carry license over a year ago, and I was thrilled at the prospect of having a gun I could actually conceal, so I wasted no time in choosing my new gun.  First I had to decide whether I would get a semi-automatic or another revolver.  Although I’m becoming more comfortable and familiar with semi-automatics, I’ve always believed that revolvers are the way to go when it comes to self-defense, at least for me.

I assume that if I ever have to use a gun in a situation like that, I’m very likely to be in a big hurry and great danger.  I don’t want to have to chamber a round and fumble for the safety before I can fire.  I don’t want the possibility of a jam in the back of my mind.  I know that familiarity makes all of that much faster and many people carry semi-automatics with a round already in the chamber, but  I love the simplicity of point-and-shoot.  No chance that it’s going to jam.  No need to remember if the safety is on or off.  And many people believe that the curves of a revolver make them easier to conceal on a woman’s curvy body.

After talking to Perry and doing a little research, I knew that I wanted a .38 special.  It provided enough stopping power to satisfy Perry but was light and compact enough that I was confident I could conceal it effectively.  With a model rated for higher powered +P ammunition, a .38 special has almost the same power as a 9mm.

{The belt is for my .357 on the back of my hip.  I don’t normally wear 2 guns, but I put the other on for these pics.  Can you see the concealed .38 special?  I thought not.}

{Now you can see the .357, but the .38 is still well-hidden, especially if you don’t know that I have it in the first place.}

I looked at and handled the revolvers in Academy Sports, Bass Pro Shop, and several other stores and learned that I loved the shrouded hammer feature found in certain models.  It was one less thing to snag when the gun is being worn or drawn, making for faster draws and less chance of accidental fire.

I started my online research by looking at endless reviews.  I learned that a review alone is nearly meaningless, since the gun is usually provided free of charge to writers.  They want to keep ‘em coming, so reviews on any model are positive almost without exception.  That’s not to say that they aren’t honest opinions; maybe reviewers decline to write about the ones they can’t recommend enthusiastically.  I do the same on my blog when I review items that I received free.

However, these reviews were limited in how much they could help with my decision.  Of course gun lovers are going to love nearly every gun, but which gun was the best choice for me?

Instead, I searched for comparisons between the models I was considering.  Now I could see how they stacked up against one another. I could begin to see who loved particular models over others, and why.  I could see where each model really stood out, and where it was not quite the best.

Finally, I was ready to make my choice.  I wanted a Ruger LCR.  It was lightweight, compact, rated for +P loads, and was supposed to have the best trigger on the market.  Not a short or light trigger, which could make accidental discharge a concern, but a long smooth pull on the trigger that would make a high level of accuracy possible.  I liked the night sights, but Perry encouraged me to spring for the laser sight in spite of the steep premium.  With a small gun like this, a red dot shining on the bad guy can increase the psychological impact, giving a potential victim more time to act while also improving her accuracy in a panic situation.

Thanks to Google Shopping, I found that online prices were far lower than local.  I was able to buy my gun online and have it shipped to a local dealer, who charged $25 for his service as a mediator.  My gun arrived in a few days, and my background check was consisted of a brief phone call when I went to pick it up.  I was able to go home that day with my new baby.

But don’t worry – I still love my first one.

My post today is late, and that’s because I’m distracted.  I have weighty matters on my mind, and I don’t mean my own weight.  But since we’re talking about me, I’ll stay on topic and confess that I think I may have torn the rotator cuff in my right shoulder.

I guess sedentary 38yo women should ease into push-ups, rather than doing 175 on each of the first 2 days.

I thought I paid for that foolishness right away, because my right shoulder was so sore I did only 100  push-ups over the next 2 days.  Silly me.  As it turns out, that was just a down payment.  Since then the soreness has diminished and stabilized but never disappeared.  It hasn’t kept me from doing 100-150 push-ups each day, but maybe it should.  Go ahead and laugh at my pigheadedness.  The tenderness in my shoulder now makes me hesitate before making any of several simple motions, most of which involve raising my arm over my head or reaching out to the side and up.  Those symptoms just tend to confirm the diagnosis in my mind.

The frustrating thing is that I really wanted to continue with a daily regimen of 100 push-ups per day and add another similar exercise.  Now I’ll probably have to give up the progress I already made.  Let me be a lesson to you.  I’m not sure what we’ve learned here, but let’s not do it again.

Oh, and our workout schedule has completely disintegrated.  And I had ice cream for 3 of my last 5 meals.  And I’m going through a lot of chocolate over the past week.  Just thought you should know.  But I’m a good mom.  Those ice cream sessions involved not just me, but 8 people, 6 spoons, and 1/2 gallon of Blue Bell around the kitchen island.  They were family time, quality time.  Good times.

And because this post may come across as a bit on the glum side, here’s a laugh for you.  Perry Boy just told me his favorite movie was Bambi, which his sisters bought for his birthday.  ”Did you know that movie was made when my grandma was a little girl?”

His eyes widened.  ”Whoa!  So it’s older than you?  It’s SUPER OLD!!!”

Maybe it’s time to change the title of these weekly updates.  I’m not losing any weight; in fact, I have gained back a bit.  Maybe it’s partly Parker’s fault; he is nursing more instead of less, and I always hold some extra weight while nursing.  But hubby and the kids tell me I’m looking better than I have in a long time, so I’m not worried about the insults being hurled at me by the scale.  I hardly even step on the scale now.  Instead, I try on clothes from my teenage daughters’ closets.  :)

We’re still doing P90X in theory, but when life is crazy it can be well-nigh impossible to squeeze in a 60-90 minute workout, especially for Perry when he’s gone 13 hours a day or more.  When we manage, we love it.  When we don’t, we feel frustrated and/or guilty.  Or maybe that’s just me.

I am *loving* this push-up challenge.  I think I mentioned last week that several members of our family and a much bigger circle of friends and acquaintances are working toward 3,000 push-ups for the month of September.  When we started, I could do 17 push-ups.  For the first 25 years of my life I couldn’t do a single one so I felt pretty good about doing 17.

But now, after 19 days (minus Sundays, on which we rest), I can do sets of 40!  I never expected to increase so quickly, so I’m honestly delighted!  I think it has helped that with each set I push until I can’t do another, then I rest just a few seconds (5 or less) and do as many more as I can.   I have done up to 200 in a day (but usually more like 120), and Perry has done 450 on some days!  Kaitlyn and Lydia are in it too, though they could both exercise circles around us if they wanted to.  We’re all seeing big changes in ourselves and each other, and it’s so much fun to encourage and challenge each other.

I’m also doing more with the kettle bell.  Usually I have to be careful not to push too hard because I end up crippled 48 hours later, but it seems that the regular exercise has strengthened and conditioned me so that I can push myself harder without injury.  Instead of the 12-20 that I usually start with, I’m doing 50 swings at a time now, and plan to start doing 2 sets/day.  My legs are noodles by the end, but that’s to be expected.  Here’s the great part: I don’t feel a thing the next day.

I’m still a little apprehensive about how cold weather will affect my appetite.  I always tend to gain weight in cold weather, and while I’m much less concerned about the numbers now, I still don’t want to lose the ground I’ve gained over the past 11 weeks.

Do you tend to gain weight in cold weather?  How do you combat the appeal of hot food in cold weather? I’m thinking soups will be very helpful – warm and filling, and not necessarily packed with carbs or calories.

 

After 10 weeks, I feel like a loser.  I’m back to eating more than I need, keeping my stomach’s gas tank on 1/2 or 3/4 instead of staying nearly empty the way I want.  I feel best when I’m nearly empty (not hungry, but always ready for a snack) but I just have trouble resisting constant munchies.  I’ll bet I’m not alone here.  I blame Parker’s renewed interest in nursing along with my own lack of discipline.  Maybe the cooling weather is working against me too.  I never have much appetite when the temps are in the triple digits, but now that we’ve dropped to the high 90′s (are you laughing?) food looks and sounds better than ever.  When soup weather arrives, I’m a goner!

In spite of this, I’m holding steady about 5 lbs. above where I feel I should be, which is really no big deal to me.  I’m not going to let myself get worked up over the numbers.  They’re just landmarks to give me an idea of where I stand.  I have new muscles and new energy – at least I will, if I ever get any sleep – so I’m thrilled with the changes I’ve experienced and looking forward to more.

After 2 crazy weeks in which there was simply no time for working out, Perry and I have started back on P90X along with our daily 120 push-ups.  I started out doing them in sets of 10 or 12, then 15, then 20.  Today I did my first-ever set of 30 push-ups!  I’m amazed at how push-ups work the entire core and not just the arms.  My back and abs ache along with my arms after each set, and I can see new definition around the sides of my abs where I don’t think I’ve ever seen it before. Who knows?  Under my little round pouch of belly fat, I just might be hiding a 6 pack.

I think I’ve mentioned using a kettle bell in the past, and I’m thinking now of adding some basic swings to my daily routine.

I have to take it easy, though.  That thing is so effective that a couple of 30 second sessions can leave me aching for days.  I tend to feel like I’m just getting warmed up, and then I realize too late that I’ve already overdone it.  I love it because there’s no temptation to quit too soon – it’s the exact opposite.  How many exercises can do that?

What is your favorite exercise or workout?  Which one do you hate most?  Do you do it anyway?

FOOD

This week was different.  I didn’t lose any weight – in fact, I gained back 2 or 3 pounds thanks to 3 days of over-indulgence.  How’s that for keeping it real?  I’m a sucker for queso with sausage, for my mom’s amazing BBQ chicken slow-cooked over a wood fire, for my sister’s little peach/cream cheese/croissant delicacies.  I’m a goner when it comes to ice cream with my sister’s homemade fudge sauce – rich, creamy, and not too sweet.  Homemade pizza, brownies and real whipped cream with our friends from Plymouth Rock Ranch on Sunday night didn’t help either!

I’m still new to the idea of eating moderately while we celebrate holidays or have big family gatherings, and I don’t like the way I ate over the past several days.  I’m certainly not beating myself up for enjoying wonderful food with dear friends and family, but I don’t think it’s necessary to come away from a great meal feeling uncomfortably stuffed.

I need to find a good balance, one where I can freely enjoy food without crossing the line into overeating.  Have you found yours? It’s surprising  to me that it can be such a hard line to strike, since being too full really detracts from the pleasure afterward.  I want to enjoy my food with no regrets!

EXERCISE

We’re now on week 5 of our P90X workouts.  I have to confess, rigorous workouts are not my cup of tea – not something I would ever start on my own – but they have really increased my energy levels.  The first 2 weeks left me drained, but now I find myself fidgeting and feeling better than ever!  I can also see changes in my body.  At first  I worried a little about getting too muscular – I do tend to gain muscle pretty quickly – but I realized my muscles don’t really show unless I flex them.  I just look more toned in my arms and shoulders, not big and manly.  Maybe any woman who exercises looks like I do when she flexes her muscles?  Don’t expect any pictures, though.  :)  Don’t worry. I still have plenty of body fat.

Last week we also started a new challenge at the invitation of a larger circle of friends: we’re doing 3,000 push ups in the month of September.  This is my cup of tea.  I do them in sets of 10 or 15 throughout the day, aiming for 125/day, 6 days/week.  It’s challenging, and my right shoulder is prone to hurt if I push too hard (like the first day, when I did 175), but I think I can do this!  Perry, Kaitlyn and Lydia have also taken the challenge, and we all check in with the others in a small private online group.

NEXT

For the near future, I plan to keep exercising – Perry and I are both seeing good results, but I won’t be trying to lose any additional weight.  I reached my initial goal, which is where my “thermostat” seems to be set.  I’ve never maintained a weight lower than a 5 lb. range where I am right now, and although I would love to be just a little slimmer, I would hate to constantly fight my own body to maintain a weight that just isn’t natural to me.   Instead, I’ll focus on eating appropriate foods and amounts while trying to keep my activity level up.  I’ll be happy if a few more pounds accidentally fall off, but it’s not part of my goal now.

Of course you could make the argument that this activity level isn’t natural to me either, and you might very easily talk me out of exercising altogether.  If you want to try, go for it.  I’m all ears, because while I do like the way it makes me feel, I still hate exercise.  :)

As a mom of many and a homeschooler, I have learned that people will automatically feel judged by our decisions, and it’s perfectly logical.  When we decide to do things one way, we are demonstrating by our actions that we feel this way is better than that way – at least for ourselves, in our situation.

What our actions and decisions may not make clear is our reasoning and motivation.  Consequently, onlookers often feel the need to fill in the blanks.

Last week, a reader suggested that my own resolution to lose weight was unkind or even hateful toward overweight women.  I found it a little hurtful and I feel she is guilty of judging me just as harshly as she assumes I am judging her, but I also realize that it’s very important to clarify my reasoning and motivation so that others don’t misunderstand as she has.

Why lose weight when I have so little to lose?

I am exercising and eating less because I want to be a good steward of the body and resources God has given me.  When my level of physical fitness declines because I am eating more than I need to, or because I am being lazy, that is poor stewardship.  My weight or body-fat percentage does not measure my holiness or true beauty, but they can be outward indicators of some character flaws in my own life.  I was guilty of gluttony, and I know this because I was consistently eating even when I wasn’t hungry.  I was wasting food by consuming what I didn’t need and couldn’t even properly appreciate.

The weight that crept on over the years was not sinful; it was just confirmation of sin within me.

Do I believe that everyone who is overweight is in sin?

No.  That doesn’t mean that everyone who is overweight or heavier than I am is guilty of gluttony or laziness.  I know plenty of people who eat less than I do, exercise more, constantly fight hunger, and weigh more than I do.  A trim body does not equal holiness or righteousness.  But God has given me a body that can maintain a trim shape with only a reasonable amount of activity and self-control, and so I think it may be sin for me to be overweight.

I am not judging the personal habits or hearts of the people around me; I am judging my own.

Does fat disgust me?

On myself, excess fat does bother me, because it is a visible, tangible sign of my own laziness and lack of self-control.  I don’t look at somebody else’s squishy tummy and think, “Ew!”  because her squishy tummy doesn’t hold the same meaning that mine does for me.  On others, it’s not my business or my concern.  I don’t know their circumstances, their diet, or their health unless they choose to discuss it with me.  If they choose to join me in setting and sharing goals, I think we can all benefit from the accountability and encouragement.

I have friends who are heavier or slimmer than I am, and I value each of them.  I don’t judge them based on their weight and body type or what I saw them eat last time we were together, and I hope they don’t judge me based on anything so shallow.

Am I teaching my daughters to hate their bodies?

I don’t think so.  We laugh about the stretch marks on my belly and I call them battle scars.  My girls understand what I explain above – that I’m trying to hold myself to a high standard not because it’s the only way to be beautiful, but because God gave me strong muscles and it’s lazy to let them go to waste.  We know curves are beautiful, and they know that their dad likes my jiggly parts.  They know that some men like more jiggle than others, and that a good man loves his own wife’s shape and size.  They understand that a healthy woman has some fat on her body, and none of them aspires to look like a runway model.

Can fat people be fit and healthy?

A slim person can certainly be healthier than a fat person, and we all know it’s possible to be too thin.  However, there are undeniable connections between excessive weight and certain conditions like heart disease and diabetes, and not many are worried about an epidemic of skinniness in America.  In a nation fraught with health problems it’s not a bad idea to exercise more and eat better – and for most of us, eating better also means eating less. The undeniable pattern is that for most of us, an active lifestyle and a healthy diet will lead to a trimmer and leaner shape than we currently sport.

Do I think you should lose weight?

Wrong question.  Do you think you should lose weight?  Why?

Is anyone still with me?

It’s been 7 weeks since my last drink – no, wait.  That’s not right.  It’s been 7 weeks since my last ice cream, except for last night.  I had 2 scoops, with toasted pecans.  It was sooo worth it!

WEIGHT

My weight seems to have plateaued, but I think I’m ok with that.  I wake up nearly every morning at about 11 or 12 lbs. below where I used to wake up, and just a few pounds heavier than where I woke up as a 17yo, so I’m happy for now.

FOOD

I’m still working hard to eat only when hungry, or at least to keep my “gas tank” on 1/4 instead of 3/4.  Perry thinks I’m weird, but I think it makes everything taste better!  Doesn’t food taste better when you are hungry?  So if you’re always hungry when you eat, everything tastes better, right?  What’s to dispute?

EXERCISE

I’m working hard on eating moderately, but I’m working even harder on exercising.  Perry and I have a running joke that we are each doing this for each other, and neither of us really wants to be doing it at all.  The truth is he wants both of us to do it, and I want only him to do it.  Just kidding.  I may hate exercise while I do it, but I love it when it’s done.  I love a little muscle soreness to remind me that I really accomplished something, and I love that I can already see real results – and so can the rest of the family.

I have new muscle definition in my legs, where I haven’t seen definition for many moons.  I feel more energetic – except right after a workout, at which point I feel like a zombie, but in a good way.  At least I keep telling myself that, in the hope that I’ll believe it someday.  Can zombies feel anything at all?  I don’t know.  I’ll let you know.

BODY FAT

I do have a new theory about my body fat and muscles.  After measuring my lovely daughters with my body fat caliper, I was very surprised to find that the measurements on my flabby ole’ bod put my body fat level on a par with my fit young children, even when adjusted for age.

Here’s my theory.  Feel free to shoot it down if you think my head sounds fatter than the rest of my body.

When I was young, I worked hard and exercised hard and developed a lot of muscle.  I know this much is true.

When I got older and lazier, I thought the muscle wasted away and was replaced by fat.  It looked like that was happening.  I lost much of my tone, gained some weight, and gave up on all my old clothes.

Now I think that most of the muscle is still hiding in there, masquerading as fat.  It’s limp and quiet and lazy muscle.  It’s been doing a good job hiding all these years, but the caliper has revealed it.  Except the muscles responsible for situps.  I think they walked off the job and were never seen again.  They’re probably hiding somewhere in Gov. Arnold’s arms.  I wonder if they do situp-muscle transplants yet, and how would a person get on the waiting list?

But all the rest of my flab might just be lazy, untoned muscles.  Well, most of it.  There’s still some flabby fat consorting with the flabby muscles.

What does this mean?  If I’m right, it might mean I’m not crazy when I think I see new muscle definition after just 2 weeks and a total of 9 workouts (I missed 3 workouts).  Does that seem possible?

Well, I have plenty of time to think it over.  We’re only 2 weeks into 90 days of torture hour long daily workouts, though I do admit to enjoying some days, just a little.  The yoga on Thursday is fun, and the Kenpo on Saturday is exhilarating.  And the Arms & Shoulders workout on Wednesdays isn’t bad at all.  And I did much better on Chest & Back last Monday.

Now I really do sound crazy.

How is your weight loss/exercise going?

It’s been 6 weeks since I decided to lose the weight that has crept up on me over the last 19 years, and it’s time for another update.  I don’t know how much you all care about reading my updates, but I think knowing that I will share an update every 7 days really helps keep me motivated, so pretend you care.  ;)

Over the past 7 days, I did lose just a bit more weight.  One pound, I think.  I’m finding it difficult to remember exactly where I started – is that strange to you? – so I’m very tempted just to start posting my weight.  I don’t know if I should because…well, because of my own twisted female logic and the fact that others might think like me.

If I post my weight every week,  somebody out there might think to herself, “That’s not so bad.  I don’t know why she’s even concerned.  She’s so self-absorbed.  I weight XX more than that!”

And somebody else might think, “Is that all?  She’s just showing off, or trying to make the rest of us feel fat.  I’m never reading her blog again.”

And somebody else might think, “Wow!  She weighs that much??? I never knew KimC was so heavy!  She must be hiding some chunky thighs under those skirts.”

OK, I’m not so worried about that last one.  If somebody wants to tell me I don’t look my weight – in a good way – I’m happy to hear it. And yes, I do have chunky thighs, but that’s not why I wear skirts.

But I don’t want to seem like I’m bragging.  And maybe nobody would accuse me of bragging once they saw the number, so I’m worrying for nothing.

What do you think?  Should I share my actual weight every week, or just my loss?

At any rate, my very bottom weight now is the top of my pre-marriage/pre-pregnancy weight range.  If I eat too much salt or just too much food one day, I instantly gain about 4 lbs. (curse you, water retention!) and I’m out of range again, but at least I can touch the range now!

Maybe my first 4 lbs. when I started 6 weeks ago shouldn’t count for that very reason, but we don’t always have to be rational, do we?  I want to count them, so I can say that I’ve lost 12 or 13 lbs. so far.  That sounds so much better than 8 lbs. doesn’t it?

I was on and off the wagon when it comes to diet, relaxing some days and eating very light on others.  While I do slip toward old habits occasionally, I think my bad days now don’t even compare to how I used to eat.  Unlike our new exercise program, I think the diet is something I can live with – more or less – for an indefinite time.  I want to say forever, but I don’t know about that…

Body fat

I know that weight isn’t supposed to be how we measure our health, and I honestly don’t depend as heavily on the numbers as you might think.  The main reason I’m aiming for my pre-preg weight range is because I know I have a lot more fat and less muscle.  Even when I reach that weight, I will still have a much higher percentage of body fat than I used to have.

In the interest of getting a better picture of our true fitness level, we bought a body fat caliper from Amazon last week.  The cheapest one ($5!) had great reviews, which made me happy.  When it arrived, I learned why it had such great reviews: it tells sweet little lies.  I am not so gullible as to believe that my body is in the lean category.  I do not need to gain some body fat to reach the “ideal” range.  I just need to find a better more accurate way to measure my body fat.

I was not surprised when Google showed me 100 different ways to measure body fat with 100 wildly varying results.  I kept trying until I got results that lined up with my own preconceived body image.  What else could I do?

The take-away lesson for me was to pay attention to my own measurements and how they change rather than where they fall on somebody’s chart.

Exercise

Perry and I started P90X last week, and it’s hard. I knew that already, and I’m fine with it.  I still don’t blame the workout for last week’s back injury, but I did miss the 2 following workouts because of it.  I think I did pretty well for the rest of the week, and while my muscles are still very sore – I spent most of the weekend limping around the house moaning about my aching [legs, shoulders, buns, fill in the blank] – I am looking forward to building and toning my muscles again.

I think watching the rest of the family suffer through Insanity helps my opinion of P90X. While others are talking about how brutal it is, I’m thinking, “This isn’t so bad.  This isn’t nearly as strenuous as Insanity.  I can do this!”

On the other hand, I often do reach the point where I just can’t go on and have to take a break.  To my surprise, I nearly always find that if I had pushed for another 10 seconds I would have made it to the next break.  Oh, and once Perry pointed out that “break” doesn’t mean I have to jog in place and do jumping jacks like that Big Stupid Show-Off Tony Horton and his 3 Show-Off Sidekicks, I did much better.

Did I mention I hate exercise?  I’d much rather starve to death than exercise to death.  Or to skinniness.  Whatever the goal, I prefer starvation as a method.

 

I decided 4 weeks ago that I wanted to lose 10-15 lbs. of weight that has crept on over the years.  Then I posted 2 weeks ago that I had already lost 9 lbs.

The week after that I was on the road, having slumber parties with Smockity.  Have you tried her pizza?!  She melted a stick of butter in each pan before she spread the crust, and we were all in heaven.  I ate 5 pieces for lunch.

I did not lose weight that week.  I blame Smockity.  Of course there was also a wedding and plenty of good friends with other friends, but mostly I blame Smockity’s pizza.

When I got home, I found myself slipping back into old habits.  Instead of waiting for my stomach to growl, I ate when it was time to eat or when somebody offered me something appealing.  I took Rachael out for a big, juicy birthday cheeseburger and shake.  Hubby took me out to eat not once, not twice, but three times to celebrate our anniversary.  :)

I didn’t lose weight last week either.

In light of my performance over the past 2 weeks, I’m very thankful that I haven’t gained back what I lost.  I’m still down by 9 lbs. and I’m happy about it.  Now I want to get back on track and lose more!

If you’re working on losing weight, how have you done?  Win, lose or draw?

I want to be a loser

I want to be a loser, 1 week later

It’s been 2 weeks since I decided to lose some stubborn baby weight, and guess what?  The scale says I’ve lost 9 lbs.  I’m stunned.  I would question the honesty of the scale but it’s saying very realistic things to everyone else in the family.

Furthermore, my shorts reveal the truth.  I have a pair of navy blue shorts that I have owned and worn for years.  I wore them to a friend’s house on the 4th of July and by the end of the first hour, had to unbutton them.  If I were home I would have changed.  Since I wasn’t home, I had plenty of time to think over why I had to spend the day with my shorts unbuttoned.  That was the day I decided to lose some weight.

I’m wearing those shorts now, and they fit the way they did when I bought them.  Ahhh.

I have a few thoughts:

1. My weight tends to fluctuate about 3 lbs. day by day – at least it did before I cut back my eating 2 weeks ago – and I started at a high point.  That means the first 3 lbs. didn’t really count.  Not all of them.  I knew that already.
2. The heat helps.  It’s a great appetite suppressant.
3. I really have ramped up my activity level.  I’m not doing aerobics, but I’m doing a LOT of isometrics and some very purposeful puttering.  That should count for something, shouldn’t it?
4. I feel good. I feel lighter on my feet already, and I walk with a spring in my step that I didn’t have 2 weeks ago.
5. I bought a size 2 denim skirt at the thrift store last week, and it’s my new favorite.  That’s not to say I am a size 2.  I’ve never worn a size 2 before and I still don’t, and the skirt is obviously sized incorrectly.  Nevertheless, it’s my new favorite and probably wouldn’t have fit 2 weeks ago.  I like to say I lost 6 sizes in 2 weeks.  :)

I have probably cut back too much.  I’m not going hungry – I’m eating when I get hungry just like I planned and I feel great – but when I think about the amount of food I eat over the course of most days, I know it’s probably not enough to stay healthy.  It’s fun to approach my goal this quickly, but I’m going to have to learn what it takes to maintain a healthy weight.  That means eating more without going back to my old eating habits.  That could be tricky.

But first, I want to continue with the weight loss.  I initially said my goal was 10 lbs, then 15.  Well, after nearly 10 lbs. I feel better but I certainly don’t feel done.  I still have plenty of padding, and since it went so quickly I would love to lose another 10, making a total of 20.  That may sound like a lot to some, but on my frame it isn’t.  I don’t think most people can even tell that I’ve lost weight at all, so another 10 would only make me appear marginally slimmer and get rid of a little more excess padding.  It would put me under my wedding weight but still with considerably less muscle, which means more fat and more inches.  I’m not expecting to ever see my pre-wedding waistline again, but I wouldn’t mind getting the hips down to their old size.

Since things are going so well, I’m not going to work on cutting back any more.  I just want to continue toning and increase my activity level a little more.  I totally forgot about the kettle bell all week and I love using it, so there’s my goal for the upcoming week: USE THE KETTLE BELL!

That’s my weight-loss update for the week, and I’m off to swing the bell.

How did you do this week?

Enter our current giveaway: Large Family Logistics

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Since I announced last week that I wanted to lose a bit of extra baby weight, I have made 2 big changes.

First, I worked hard to change the way I eat.  I haven’t made any substantial changes to what I eat, but the way I eat has undergone some extensive remodeling.  I really hope I haven’t bitten off more than I can chew with these changes, but it felt easy so far and I feel great!

Inspired by my little sister’s recent loss of 30 lbs, I followed her lead and just quit eating so much.  I eat when I’m hungry.  When I’m not hungry, I stop. It’s about as groundbreaking as the classic SNL skit Don’t Buy Stuff You Cannot Afford, but it really works.

I stuck to my intention of drinking a glass of water whenever the urge to snack struck, and ended up drinking tons of water while hardly snacking at all.  I have grazed and kept my stomach comfortably full for so long that for the first two days, I think my body had a little trouble remembering how to express real hunger: I got light-headed several times waiting for hunger signals that never appeared and I had to eat even though my stomach didn’t actually rumble.  After that, my body and I seemed to communicate better.

Now when I eat, I’m shocked – flabbergasted at how little it takes to be “not hungry,” instead of eating til I’m full.

Basically I’m keeping my “gas tank” on 1/4 instead of 3/4.

Eating this way has a few perks I didn’t expect:

1. Food tastes better when you’re hungry.  Duh.
2. Being hungry makes me just slightly fidgety.  Fidgety = calories burned.  This is in stark contrast to the bloated whale effect when I’m almost full all the time, which makes me want to lie around until I have digested a bit – then go see what else looks good since I have a bit of room in my belly.
3. If I keep myself just on the edge of [genuine stomach] hunger, I’m always up for a treat if the opportunity comes along.   It’s like gassing up at every station you pass, but only adding a gallon or two.  Note: when I say “treat” I don’t necessarily mean a sweet: I mean a few bites of anything yummy and appealing.

Over the past 7 days, we had dinner at some friends’ home, where they served us burgers, hot dogs, beans, chips, soda, and lots of ice cream for dessert.  We had our oldest daughter’s 18th birthday party, where we did another low country boil, a watermelon eating contest, marshmallow roasting, and ice cream with strawberries and lots of whipped cream for dessert.  We had a church fellowship meal, followed by a birthday party for my mom with banana splits and the most delicious peanut butter cheesecake I have ever eaten.

Because I avoided the empty carbs I don’t care for at each of these meals and ate very moderate portions of the foods I did like, I was able to enjoy dessert each time.  In fact, I think I enjoyed desserts more than usual because I wasn’t bloated from too much dinner, and the pleasure lasted longer because I also wasn’t uncomfortably full from too much dessert.

The second change I made was to increase my activity level.

I didn’t start a vigorous new exercise program.  I did walk 2.5 miles once last week, but you probably do twice that every week, don’t you?

When I say I increased my activity level, I just mean I quit sitting around like a lump all day.

For one thing, I started running far more errands here at the house:

• When I needed my purse, I got it myself.
• When I needed a glass of water, I got it myself.
• When one of the little ones wanted a drink, I got it myself.
• And a hundred other examples…

I can’t say I took every single opportunity that arose, but I did get up and move around much more than usual.  As often as not, while I was up getting a glass of water, I decided to do 2 or 3 or 10 other things while I was up, so the activity built upon itself.

The other way I changed my activity level was by incorporating some low-key exercises and isometrics into my day:

• I did quick set of kettle-bell swings now and then to ramp up my pulse and breathing (1-2 minutes)
• I did a set of triceps dips on a nearby chair once or twice/day (1 minute)
• I got down on the floor and held a low-plank position or a bridge while reading email on my phone.
• I leaned back slightly on a stool while reading aloud to the children.  When sitting in a chair, I scooted forward just a little and leaned back slightly.  Great ab workout!
• In the van, I leaned my seat back a little more than I wanted, then used my abs to sit more upright.
• I did squats while looking through my drawer for clothes each morning.
• I walked through the house in a goofy, bent-knee position for the entertainment of the children.  ”Look!  I’m doing the exercise walk!  I’m getting skinny!”

I didn’t do every one of the items above every day or at every opportunity, but I tried to make sure I was doing significantly more than I usually do.  Obviously this level of activity is not going to make or break a diet, but I do want to tone the muscles in certain areas as I shed some of the insulation that’s covering them.  I think it’s sufficient for that goal.

Results?

I’m down by 5 lbs. already.

Wait – don’t leave!  Don’t hate me!  It’s not like I actually lost 5 lbs. of body fat, or even 5 lbs. of body weight.  It’s more like my stomach isn’t carrying around 5 lbs. of food.

After one week, I’m happy with my progress (who wouldn’t be?) and excited to see what the next week holds.  I don’t expect to lose nearly so much over the next week, but if I can maintain my new habits and take off another pound or two I will be more than satisfied.

Parker is still nursing heavily, and I was surprised that my diet seemed to have only a minimal effect on my milk supply.  Of course it’s not a big deal since he eats a lot of solid food already, but he enjoys nursing and I’m glad I won’t have to worry about milk supply issues.

Since I already made so many changes, this week I’d like to continue on same path: eating only when hungry, stopping when I’m not hungry (don’t just keep eating until I’m out of room!), doing quick exercises throughout the day and taking opportunities to get off my tail and walk to the other end of the house.

How did you do?  Give an update in the comments or link to a post of your own!

I admitted recently that I have gained about 10 lbs. over the years.  I blame nursing for 5 of the pounds, so that’s Parker’s fault, but actually the total is closer to 15 lbs.  I think that means I still have to take credit for gaining  and holding 10 lbs. on my own.

And so…

I’m going to lose it.

See?  That was easy.  Now I just have to do it.  Who wants to hold me accountable and check up on me?  Who wants to join me?  If I post weekly on the subject, will you leave a comment updating your own progress?  If I don’t post, will you remind me?

My plan is nothing crazy.  It’s already crazy hot here and we don’t have a/c, so you won’t see me spending 45 minutes/day on aerobics or the treadmill.  I probably won’t even walk very often.

What I will do is some quick toning exercises several times/day (maybe I’ll set alarms on my phone for reminders!).  I’ll also make an effort to get up and do stuff as often as possible.  Instead of asking the kids to do things, I’ll be the one to run an item down to the van (up and down 12 steep stairs), or go turn on the hose for the little guys (up and down 12 steep stairs), or pick up the clothes that blew off the rack and into the yard (up and down…oh, you already know).

I know that’s not enough to make a big difference, but I don’t plan to make huge, sweeping changes to my diet either. I already eat a reasonably healthy diet with very little processed foods, fast food, or empty carbs.  I eat lots of produce and dairy and eggs, a bit of meat, and some sweets here and there.  I know I talk a lot about chocolate and ice cream, but a tiny pint of ice cream usually lasts me nearly a month.

So here’s the big thing:  I’m not going to eat unless I’m hungry, and when I’m almost full, I’ll stop. That’s huge for me.  I’m a casual muncher, a grazer, a social eater.  I nibble and browse and rarely eat a big meal but rarely stop eating altogether.  I spend more time mostly full than mostly empty.

If I get the munchies and I’m not truly hungry – no hunger pangs in ma’ belly – I’ll start with a glass of water.  If that doesn’t do the trick, I’ll have a glass of milk.

That’s my plan.  What’s yours?

No, I didn’t get raptured, though I did enjoy the jokes that were flying thick and fast.

Rapture jokes are flying like there’s no tomorrow.

Can’t think of a rapture joke? Don’t worry – it’s not the end of the world.

I’ve been nursing and rocking a sick baby, swatting a troublesome toddler who is entirely too cute for her own good, helping 2 children with 2 sewing projects, and polishing up part 6 of my series over on Frugal Hacks.  The new one goes live Tuesday morning, so pop over there bright and early and tell me what you think.  Please?

Oh – baby’s awake and crying.  Is it bad that I think sick babies are the sweetest?  I love snuggling those sad, sweaty heads.  Not so much at 2 AM, but we can’t have everything just the way we want it…

Shamelessly stolen from 12yo Megan’s facebook page.  She’s quite a writer.  I know Meg reads this blog occasionally.  I wonder how long it will take her to notice that I posted this piece on her behalf?  ~Mom

If I lived in a world of my own, I would always wear black and white checks and ruby slippers.

People would still use typewriters in my world, and put records on, and drive old cars with red leather seats.

Girls would wear birdcage veils, and men would wear vests and shoulder holsters.

Everyone would have a library with a rolling ladder, and everyone would listen to Frank Sinatra.

People would call each other “dahling” and it wouldn’t be weird.

We’d have wicker strollers that we’d push our babies in while wearing high heels, and everyone would read Kipling.

How about you?

 

Puppy baths, just in time for another prospective buyer this evening.  They want a girl.  Who will it be?  Daisy, Bluebell or sweet little Annie?

Cranberry walnut bread…

and handsome new chairs to replace our 10-year-temporary folding metal ones.  Six chairs plus last year’s oak benches between them provide plenty of seating.  Merry Christmas to me!

Christmas cards?  Still not done.  Oops.

What’s happening in your house?  What didn’t happen yet?

Perry Boy is 4 now, and quite verbal.  However, he has some trouble with the “L” sound.

Boy: Mom, how do you write cow?

Mom: C….O….W [Like a good homeschool mom, I pronounce both the name and sound of each letter.]

Boy: W?  [Frowns while he thinks about his alphabet video.]  Is that the one that wicks wah-wee-pops?

Four year olds make me smile.

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Vote for Leanna
A sweet young homeschool graduate of whom we know has entered a contest to win a scholarship of up to $2,000.  Please consider voting for Leanna’s essay in answer to the question, “Did you ever think that the greatest thing any man could ever be in the economy of God was to be a servant?”

When the word “servant” is mentioned, what common picture is conjectured? I close my eyes and there—there is the poor little servant girl with her ragged shift and bare feet. A froth of messy curls spring out from underneath the kerchief over her hair. With weary shoulders knotted from toil, she performs once again her menial tasks. Her hands are course, red, and sore. Sorrow and care has paved her face with hard lines. Such is the dismal picture that many paint upon the contemplation of what it means to be a servant. How can it be, then, that the position of a servant in God’s kingdom is to be most desired?

Read the rest, and vote for Leanna.  If you really want to help her, vote up to twice daily.

Tonight was our final run in the Podrunner version of the Couch to 5K program.  I’ve been meaning to post updates since we jogging started 11 weeks ago, but never took time to do it, so here’s a quick summary:

It was hard.

Do you want the longer version?

I’ve never been a runner – never had any stamina of any sort – so this was entirely new to my body.  I pushed myself many times until I couldn’t stand up and had to keep walking to maintain my balance.  This was new in itself; normally, I hate exercise.  Although I spent much of my early life doing hard physical labor, I’ve never pushed myself to my limits like this.  Of course I could have stopped, taken a break, or even quit, but I really wanted to succeed.

There was also a bit of team psychology going on.  I wasn’t doing this for myself, and I wasn’t doing it alone.  That would have made it far easier to take it easy on myself.  I was doing this with Perry, Lydia and Kaitlyn, and I was definitely the weakest link.  If I didn’t push myself hard enough, we might all have to repeat a week because of me.  I wanted to succeed for their sake.

As it was, we repeated 2 weeks, taking a total of 11 weeks to complete the 9 week program.  But guess what?  This last week, instead of running for the prescribed 30 minutes, we’re running 5 kilometers, nonstop. We’re doing it!  Our time is lousy.  We won’t win any races this week, but now we’re ready to work on speed.  For the first time in our lives, we can run 5K!  This thing really works!

If you think you can’t do it, think again.  I started at 7 weeks post-partum, and I have been a couch-slug for the last 6 years.  I couldn’t do it either.  I was puffing and blowing in the first week, the week that’s supposed to be easy.  I was struggling to do a slow jog for 60 seconds.  Many times my “jog” was no faster than a walk.  Many times I felt like I couldn’t go on, but I just put one foot in front of the other one more time, and once more after that, and once more…

Every time, I would fall behind my husband and 2 daughters, then they would circle back to join me again.  Yes, they ran circles around this old lady.

Twice in week 8, I had to slow for unscheduled walks when I was supposed to be running.  I just couldn’t go on.

Some weeks, none of us believed we’d be ready to move on to a harder workout the following week, but you know what?  We gave it a shot, and we did it!  Now we can run for 30-40 minutes.  We are runners!

I’m not asking for a pat on the back.  I want to encourage others who may be considering a daunting new challenge: do it!  Check your motivation, of course: are you doing it for God’s glory?  If yes, then pray for His blessing on it, set your mind and your body to it, and you might be surprised at what you can do.

I still can’t believe I can run 5 kilometers.  Don’t praise me; just shake your head in wonder with me.

note: Although we used it, I don’t necessarily recommend the free Podrunner music to go along with this program.  While the heavy beats really help keep you moving and the cues to walk/run are key to striking the right intervals in your training, the music isn’t entirely free of lyrics and they’re rather sensual at times.  Use your own judgment.

I mentioned in a previous post that we don’t use air conditioning.  Some people were amazed because we live in the San Antonio area.  South Texas is not known for its mild summers.  The weather here is hot and humid.  Yes, Houston and south Florida are worse.  So are some parts of the Congo.  And I’m sure it was worse in your neck of the woods that one year back when you were 14.

I used to look with awe at friends who did without a/c.  I used to think I could never do it.  But what would I have done if I were born 100 years ago, or even 50?  Died?  Revolted, and run the streets in the nude?  I like to think I could have coped.

We ditched the window units last year in an effort to cut costs.  They really weren’t efficient or terribly effective anyway.  Yes, they kept the inside cooler than the outside, but didn’t keep it really comfortable.  They were also very noisy, and a hassle to run – always freezing up, and the filters needed very frequent cleaning since they ran 24/7.  They also didn’t last long – we were replacing them nearly every year.

So we made the plunge.  We took them out, bought a few more box fans, and opened up the house.

Last year was a doozy of a year.  We had record highs.  Daytime temps stayed over 100 for an eternity, and my memory tells me that nighttime lows were hardly better.  It was a long, hot summer.

But we acclimated.  I won’t say we didn’t mind the heat, but we did adjust.  At the beginning of the summer, we complained about temps in the mid 80′s.  By the end of the summer, the low 90′s were comfortable.  We just dreaded the afternoons that broke the 3 digit mark.

We reminded ourselves and each other that everyone used to live without a/c, and many of them wore far more clothes than we did.  Modern Americans are whiners.  This was uncomfortable, but not true suffering.

This year has been much milder.  I’m not sure we’ve even broken that all-important 3 digit mark yet, though the normal temp hovers in the mid to high 90′s.

Having said all that, here are some of the things we did to minimize our discomfort:

1. Wear less clothes. This looks different in different households, but for us this means that when we’re home during the summer we often wear long shorts and a sleeveless top.  Last summer we spent much of the time in our swimsuits – modest ones, but lighter and scantier than our normal daily wear.
2. Save your shower for midday. My morning shower has migrated toward the midafternoon, a lovely time to rinse off in a cool shower.  This probably saves us money since I’m using less hot water.
3. Use ice. We drink a lot of ice water.  Before we started making our own ice, we were spending $30-50 each month on bagged ice!
4. Frozen drinks. Lunch is often a peanut-butter/banana smoothie, made with frozen bananas.  I’m also partial to homemade frappuccinos.  The kids enjoy a koolaid slushie nearly every afternoon in the summer.  Our blender is earning its keep!
5. Cool your head. It’s a well known fact that the human body loses much of its heat through the head.  We take advantage of this by keeping our hair damp during the hottest part of the day.  A cool wet rag on the back of the neck is heavenly as well.
6. Cool your heels. The human body also gives off a lot of heat through the feet.  We stay barefoot most of the time, and I love to dip my feet in cool water.
7. Hurray for kiddie pools. I love having a kiddie pool on the deck!  The little ones can swim whenever they want, and we big people can swish our feet and splash our arms and legs.  Instant comfort.
8. Cook outside or not at all. We rarely use the oven during the summer.  We cook with a crockpot, or an electric roaster – OUTSIDE.   We grill.  We eat salads.
9. Use the stovetop sparingly. Did you know that pasta and boiled eggs will finish cooking if you bring to a boil, cover and turn off the heat?  No need to keep the burner on for 10 minutes, heating up the house.  White rice will cook this way too if you have heavy-duty cookware (I don’t).  Experiment.
10. Be aware of other heat sources. We turn off lights and computers when not in use.  We don’t use an electric dryer.  When I had carpet, I refused to run the vacuum during the heat of the day.  Even fans generate some heat, so we turn off the ones that aren’t being actively appreciated.

And a bonus tip:

1. Find the breeze. Moving air feels cooler.  If you don’t have a natural breeze, use fans.  If you don’t have a fan, resist the urge to collapse on the couch in a corner of the living room.  If the air isn’t moving, move yourself to create a breeze: get up and take a walk across the house.  Putter.   Check if it’s cooler outside, and find a nice place to sit in the shade.  We eat dinner outside nearly every evening because the house takes a bit longer to cool down.

Yes, it’s nice to be in a perfectly controlled climate.  I prefer the mid 70′s with low humidity and bright, indirect light.  I like to hang out in places with a/c.   But contrary to popular opinion, the human race can live without air conditioning.

Sure, we sweat, but once I resigned myself to sweating it just wasn’t that bad.  After all, just a generation ago nobody would have dreamed of calling air conditioning a necessity, no matter where they lived.  It was a luxury, if it even crossed anyone’s mind.

Wants vs. needs.  Isn’t it strange how easily we confuse the two?